Wife Cuts In-Laws Off From Terminal Husband's Medical Information After They Take His Donated Funds

Oct 27, 2021 by apost team

The saying goes that "blood is thicker than water," but for many people who have had toxic and uncaring families, this saying does not ring true at all. Unfortunately, not all parents are compassionate and loving to their children — and this usually results in children being estranged from them for long periods of time. Those who choose to tolerate their parents despite their shortcomings don't end up having fulfilling relationships with them in the long run. 

Some parents realize the folly of their ways and try to make amends, but some people never change and make their children's lives difficult for a long time. One woman on Reddit was having a really difficult time managing her husband's parents during one of the most painful moments in her life and uploaded a post in October 2020. Her husband had been suffering from an aggressive terminal disease and did not want his parents to know about the state of his health. 

Even though the husband had been suffering due to his illness, he was adamant that his parents be kept in the dark about how much his condition had deteriorated. His wife, the original poster (OP), respected his wishes fully, but soon realized that other family members whom she had trusted with details of her husband's condition had been talking to his parents, which ended up causing a scene. 

Unfortunately, even after asking others to respect her and her husband's wishes, the family members did not let up and told her she was in the wrong for keeping information from the husband's family. 

In her post, the OP wrote, "My (33) husband (35) has an aggressive terminal disease. It is his choice to keep his parents not up to date on everything going on with his health. They know he is terminal. And they know he is currently in the hospital." 

She continued, "He was supposed to come home by now, but there have been several setbacks, and now we aren’t sure if he will be released or if he will go into palliative care." 

The OP also added some information about the state of her husband's relationship with his parents, "They were mentally and emotionally abusive his whole life. Though, he wants nothing more that to believe they have changed and that they love him, but they keep pulling crazy crap. So, for personal reasons, and safety reasons, he has decided not to keep them updated on his condition from the hospital." 

The OP decided to honor her husband's wishes as "He is still alive, he is conscious, and he is thinking clearly. So, as far as I am concerned, it is his choice." 

Unfortunately for OP, the one family member she believed she could trust with health updates betrayed that trust and told her husband's parents about the reality of his condition, which led to major drama. The parents stormed over to the hospital, but "they found out they couldn’t visit and the hospital would not give them an update."

Naturally, this angered the parents, but OP was extremely displeased. She explained to the family member that they broke her trust and asked them to not do something like this again. 

apost.com

Unfortunately, the same thing happened a second time after which the OP decided to never share information with that family member again. The husband's family reacted quite badly to this and told the OP she was extremely wrong to keep family away from a dying man, "but as far as I’m concerned, my husband still has the right to be treated with dignity and respect and privacy. And he doesn’t owe anyone updates on his condition." 

The OP also added information about what made the husband reluctant to share information about his parents: "For ppl wondering how bad his parents are, they have been stealing donations ppl have made to our young child and depositing into their account. So, they are willing to use their sons terminal illness and their only grandchild’s name to get money for themselves." 

She found a lot of support after she posted on Reddit, and most people agreed that she did the right thing by keeping her husband's family away during this difficult time. One of the top comments stated, "I'm so sorry OP. In the midst of losing your husband, you have to deal with this. Fight the good fight to protect your husbands wishes."

To this comment, the OP responded, "Thank you. The family member that has been sharing with them said “ nothing can keep a mother away from her dying child “. I laughed and said that hospital security is doing a great job of keeping her away. Either way, that family member will no longer be trusted with any updates." 

Do you think the OP was right to keep information away from the husband's family? Tell us your thoughts, and be sure to ask others what they think about this situation as well.