What You Need To Know Before Dating A Girl Who Experienced An Abusive Relationship
Dec 19, 2018 by apost team
Women that have been victims of domestic violence or abuse have seen it all. They never deserved the pain they went through, but that same pain will always be with her. That means that they need partners that are willing to be there for them through anything that comes their way. To be with a woman who has experienced violence or abuse, you need to know that you have to fight to keep them.
You need to be a safe haven for them to land on after their tumultuous past. You need to prove that you want to be with them, and you need to provide them with love and affection in order to keep them. If you’re looking to date a girl who has been a victim of domestic violence, you need to know some things before getting into the relationship.
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1. They need support from their partners.
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When they do decide to tell you about their abusive past, you need to be understanding and supportive. You do not need to make her feel worse or feel bad for her, but simply be there for her. She doesn’t want to feel like a victim, so don’t treat her like one. What she does need to hear is that she’s strong and a survivor.
You need to tell her that she’s a courageous woman for being able to get out of that situation. She wants to hear that you’re proud of her, understand her, and will never do that to her. Remind her that you love her every chance you get because she really needs your reassurance.
2. They deserve the best, and they’re aware of it.
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This woman has been through more than you could ever believe. She knows what it feels like to be broken down, but she also knows what it feels like to move on and be happy. Now that she’s out of her abusive relationship, her standards are much higher.
She knows that she deserves a better relationship than she had in the past. So you better be up for the challenge of treating her right.
3. Victims of domestic violence require patience.
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Although you may want to pry into her innermost feelings about what truly happened to her, they need time to open up about it. The past can be triggering to talk about, so being patient before you ask questions and allowing them to open up on their own can be more beneficial.
If you’ve never suffered domestic abuse yourself, you aren’t aware of how hard it can be to talk about. They’ll open up about the abuse when they are ready and willing to. You need to be patient with their trust in order to date a victim of domestic violence.
4. Physical contact can be difficult for victims.
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When people have been through physical violence, intimacy and physical contact, in general, can be difficult to embrace. With all the suffering in her past, this woman may not feel comfortable with a touch like many other people are. Once she gains your trust, she will open up more to the idea. Make her feel relaxed, loved, and be genuine with her in order to get her to feel more comfortable with the idea of physical touch.
All of the trauma from the past can trigger her now, so if you understand and be patient, the relationship will work itself out. Don’t feel neglected or like she wants nothing to do with you, she’s just struggling with issues from her past.
5. She sometimes feels empty or lost in life.
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Just because she escaped the toxic and abusive relationship doesn’t mean that she doesn’t have scars or remaining trauma. She may not fully trust herself due to her ability to pick bad partners. She’s still recovering and needs time to figure out what she wants in life.
She may feel a little lost and empty at times, but you can help her put herself back together if you treat her kindly. She may need someone to lead her in the right direction with confidence. She needs someone to help her overcome her tragic past.
6. She cannot hide from the past.
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Although she so desperately wants to forget what has happened to her, she just cannot. It isn’t that easy. Her ex put her through some awful situations but they made her into a better person. She finally realized her worthiness and now knows her own true independence. She now loves herself after learning such a hard lesson so early in life. But this also means that she knows not to settle for less than perfect.
So if you want to date this woman, you need to know that you must make her feel loved and wanted. You need to embrace the imperfections that come from her past and you need to remind her that she is a victim, not a perpetrator. Make sure that you tell her things are never her fault. She’s taking a chance on you, so put you all into the relationship.
If you decide to get into a relationship with a victim of domestic abuse, hopefully, you can show her what true love and happiness is like. Can you think of any other things someone should know before dating a survivor?