We, Women, Need To Leave Toxic Relationships Behind And Learn Some Self-Love

Dec 26, 2018 by apost team

Dating can be messy and is almost always confusing. Relationships don't come with an instruction manual. Sometimes you end up married with a few kids, and sometimes you end up with a restraining order.

One thing we know for certain is toxic relationships never end well. I'm about to tell you everything I wish someone had told me before I found myself in a toxic relationship.

There's a good chance you're reading this because you're in a toxic relationship and want to know how to change your partner for the better. It's not going to happen. You can't change anyone who doesn't want to change and let's face it; your partner has no reason to change. They have you exactly where they want you.

You may not be able to change the people you love, but they can change you. It happens so slowly you probably won't even realize it. One day you're you, and the next thing you know you've lost everything about yourself you once loved.

Toxicity is contagious like that. The only way to stop it from spreading is to remove it from your life permanently.

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I'm about to tell you something you desperately need to hear. You are worth more than you'll ever know. You deserve to be loved. You deserve validation and reassurance. You should never have to beg for love, affection or attention.

Toxic people have a knack for making us feel like we're a burden. They'll make you feel like you're high maintenance or needy. Anyone who purposely tries to make you feel that way is not worth your time.

If someone makes you feel you need to change your looks, personality or beliefs they don't really love you. If they can't accept you for who you are, find someone who can.

There's nothing wrong with wanting to improve yourself, but do it because you want to. You are unique and perfect in your own way. Don't waste your time with someone who can't see that.

Consider yourself to be a priceless gem. You are irreplaceable. If someone makes you feel like you don't deserve love and happiness, they are toxic.

Many women stay in bad relationships because they don't think they deserve better. Maybe you have some baggage, and certain people might find you difficult to deal with. Nobody is perfect. Find someone who embraces your flaws instead of holding them against you.

You shouldn't have to force someone to commit to a relationship. If they love you, they'll want to be with you and only you. If they want to keep their options open, they're just stringing you along. Cut them loose. Find yourself someone who is decisive, someone who wants to share a future together.

Does your partner have a way of twisting things? Do they make it seem like you are always to blame? Do they constantly bring up your past during arguments? These are all toxic behaviors that should be sending up a major red flag. Not only are these signs of a toxic relationship but also an abusive relationship.

Another red flag is when your partner threatens to end the relationship every time they don't get their way. You're dating an adult, not a toddler who missed naptime. A partner who manipulates you is not worth the trouble and heartache they will undoubtedly cause.

All of your friends are getting married, moving to the suburbs and having adorable babies. It makes you want to latch onto the next single guy you meet. Don't. When you force something that should come naturally, it leads to resentment and toxic behavior. The love of your life is out there somewhere. Don't rush things. It will be worth the wait when you find the right person.

While finding an honest and patient partner should be all of our relationship goals, I'm talking about being honest and patient with yourself. Ask yourself what you really want out of a relationship.

Do you have unrealistic expectations? Are you emotionally unavailable? Are you still thinking about your ex? Do you fall in love with the idea of a person instead of falling in love with who they are?

Asking yourself difficult questions prepares you to enter into a healthy relationship instead of attracting toxic people.

Your partner should be your number one fan. They should encourage you to follow your dreams and motivate you to meet your goals. If you're feeling suffocated or uninspired, you might be in a toxic relationship.

Do you want to know what happens when you place your happiness into the hands of others? You get let down. Love yourself and know that you don't need the approval of others to be happy.

A healthy relationship allows you to continue doing the things you love. If your partner tells you to stop seeing your friends or pursuing your dreams, it's time to find a new partner.

Women are caregivers by nature. We want to see everyone around us succeed and live a happy life, and that's okay. What's not okay is when we sacrifice our own happiness for the sake of our partners.

Do you find yourself crying more often than you laugh? It's time to let them go. Are you doing everything in your power to make them happy while you're miserable? Let them go. Does it seem like they suck the happiness right out of you? It's definitely time to let them go.

Have you ever been in a toxic relationship before? When did you realize your relationship was toxic? What effect did it have on your mental health and wellbeing? Make sure you invite your friends to the conversation. No woman deserves to be in a toxic relationship.