Valerie Bertinelli Fires Back At Critics Questioning Her Enduring Love For Ex Eddie Van Halen

Oct 16, 2026 by apost team

Valerie Bertinelli is standing her ground after facing backlash for sharing a heartfelt tribute to her late ex-husband, Eddie Van Halen, on the anniversary of his death.

The “One Day at a Time” actress, 66, took to Instagram on Oct. 6, 2026, to remember the legendary Van Halen guitarist, who died in 2020 at age 65. Alongside a throwback photograph of the former couple riding in a car together, Bertinelli shared a poignant message about the memories and love that remain long after someone is gone.

“Photos may fade, like old photos do, but not the memories and never the love,” she captioned the post.

However, some social media users criticized her tribute, questioning her continued affection for Van Halen despite their 2007 divorce. Bertinelli later addressed the negative comments in a follow-up video, making it clear she would no longer let others dictate how she remembers her former husband.

“It does not take long for me to get a lot of pushback when I post a picture of me and Ed,” she explained. “It used to really bother me. It does not, not any longer.”

The actress went on to describe what she called “coercive control,” explaining that critics repeatedly berate her over her feelings until she feels pressured to change her behavior.

She said that rather than explicitly telling her she cannot love her ex-husband, detractors criticize her for months and accuse her of being “obsessed” with him, hoping she will eventually remove the photographs.

“Coercive control is insidious and it’s soul-breaking,” Bertinelli said, adding that she had learned an important lesson from the experience.

“I learned a lot, and you can’t tell me how I feel. Nobody can tell you how you feel,” she continued.

Bertinelli ended her message with a defiant declaration of love for the musician, whom she married in 1981. The couple welcomed their son, Wolfgang Van Halen, in 1991 before separating and eventually finalizing their divorce in 2007.

“So you can’t bother me. I love Ed, I’ll never stop loving Ed. And my heart loves a lot. Don’t you wish yours could too?” she said.

She captioned the video, “Strap in haters, let’s go for a little ride.”

Bertinelli’s latest comments reflect sentiments she has shared previously about her complicated but enduring bond with the rock star. In a May interview with PEOPLE, Bertinelli spoke candidly about the love she still feels for Van Halen and the final chapter of their relationship.

“I can’t help but love the man,” she said. “I went through so much with him, and I’m so grateful for the last year that we had. There’ll always be a huge part of my heart that contains Ed. He gave me the greatest gift, our son.”

Although she acknowledged that they likely would not have rekindled their romantic relationship, Bertinelli made it clear that their history remained deeply meaningful to her.

“Would we have ever been intimate together again? I really don’t think so. But I’ve never loved another man the way I loved Ed. And that’s just the way it is,” she told the outlet.

Bertinelli has also spoken about being present with Wolfgang during his father’s final moments. In her 2020 tribute, she recalled the significance of meeting Van Halen four decades earlier and expressed gratitude that she and their son could hold his hand before he died following a battle with cancer.

Van Halen’s death marked the end of a relationship that had shaped much of Bertinelli's early adult life. Despite their separation, the actress has continued to acknowledge the musician's place in her heart, emphasizing that the end of a marriage does not necessarily erase the love shared throughout it.

Her latest message serves as a reminder that grief and affection do not always follow a timeline — and that remembering someone who has died can remain deeply personal, regardless of what others think.

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What are your thoughts on Valerie Bertinelli’s tribute? Do you think the criticism leveled at her is justified? Let us know, and then pass this along to friends and family who are fans of the former sitcom star!