This Is What It's Really Like To Be A Parent Married To Someone Who Works Shifts

Oct 18, 2018 by apost team

Parenting is difficult enough without the extra pressure of social media. There are moms and dads out there who post update after update about their kids and somehow, nothing ever appears to be getting out of sorts.

How is it possible that some parents are able to post pictures of their chef worthy dinners with their kids, get through a meal with them, and still have time to wash up and get them to bed without ANY hiccups? Some parents out there certainly feel that pressure as they struggle to put together a simple recipe of Kraft's mac 'n cheese.

And yet, most parents are with someone else who works a regular 9-5 shift. That certainly explains the hiccup-less evening endeavors. Some parents have a hard time not feeling sorry for themselves. Why them? They'll fantasize what it must be like without having kids before remembering how much they love them.

However, before you feel sorry for yourself, remember that there are other parents going through similar situations. Not to mention, some parents don't have anybody else besides themselves to care for their kids. So even though you might feel utterly alone while your partner is at work, it's important to remember there are others.

apost.com

The fact of the matter is that there are so many jobs dependent on shift work. We're talking police officers, medical field workers, security guards, and many, many more. Shifts can be upwards of 15 hours long sometimes, seemingly ranging through an entire day.

And while you might be awake dealing with the kids, your partner has to sleep and recover before they go into their next oddly timed shift. In the end, it's these very shift working hours that are causing all the trouble.

During these times, a two person team dwindles down to one.

Shift hours can vary. When shift workers find someone they meet, the dating life can be challenging to get used to. Yet, as adults, we find a way. Someone might work 9am-5pm one whole week, but the next week they're working 4pm-12am.

Then you throw in overtime and it gets even more complicated. These couples manage, though, regardless of whether or not they see each other every other week. Even though one person might have a regular Saturday and Sunday weekend, the other's weekend might be on Monday and Tuesday.

Despite the difficult schedule, love for each other trumps everything.

During the dating phase, it's not unlikely for one person to be by themselves a lot. Lonely dinners; lonely nights on the couch; lonely nights sleeping alone. It's bound to happen when your partner works crazy shift schedules. You might try to stay involved socially--going out with friends to parties, movies, lunches, anything really. And you yearn for the one time your loved one can come out.

Yet, constantly showing up alone can feel defeating. Everybody else has someone, right? And you do too, right? Yet why does it feel so alone? As time goes on, you might find yourself getting used to just showing up alone while your loved one is at work.

So how does this translate to being married to someone--and also having kids together--while they work crazy shifts? You might have wondered those things before you got married and settled down and now you're living the reality. It's not so bad but it could be better.

Your loved one will miss lots of soccer games and extracurriculars but will be there every once and a while. The bottom line is that your loved one is doing the absolute best they can despite dire straights.

You are working together to give the best life possible for your kids, even though time is sacrificed.

Even though you crave a routine of your loved one coming home at a normal time and splitting up the parenting duties, you've taken a long hard look at your life and understand it's not that bad. It just means that the time you do all spend together is even more special and treasured.

Family is all about love, compassion, sacrifice, and flexibility.

And besides, your loved one works those crazy hours because they care and are trying to provide the best life possible.

Have you struggled with feeling alone as a parent? Let us know your experience in the comments and show this article to other parents you know.