This Is What Happens When You Finally Get Rid Of A Manipulative Narcissist

Jan 10, 2019 by apost team

It is easy to fall in love with a narcissist, and you may not even realize who the person truly is at first. However, a relationship with a manipulative narcissist is extremely toxic and emotionally challenging to end.

Nonetheless, once you have identified that you are in an unhealthy relationship with a narcissist, you need to find the strength and determination to stand up and walk out.

When a narcissist enters a relationship, he often is doting, affectionate and complimentary. This person may be easy to fall in love with, and you may not notice how this person changes over time.

Because narcissists are in love with themselves, they can and often do make their partners feel second-rate. They believe that the world revolves around them, and they may manipulate their partner to stay in the relationship in various ways.

Often, this is accomplished by making the woman feel as though nobody else would want her through insults and minor comments placed here and there. Self-doubt blossoms while self-esteem tanks.

Over time, you can lose a sense of who you are, and you may find your sense of self-respect spiraling downward. Even when women identify that they are not in a healthy relationship, they may cling to the hope that they can help the narcissist change.

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While some women will stay in this type of relationship for decades, others eventually find that they have had enough psychological abuse and are ready to move on with their lives.

Because you may feel like a weak shadow of who you were, however, leaving can be challenging. It requires considerable strength and courage. This individual likely will not simply accept that the relationship is over, and he can make the breakup very challenging for you.

If you are preparing to walk away from a relationship with a narcissist, be prepared for these possibilities.

To a narcissist, a relationship is not mutually beneficial and loving. Instead, it is a type of game or challenge. If you stay, he has a sense of winning this competition. If you leave, he believes that he has lost the competition to you.

However, a narcissist will not accept defeat and simply walk away. Instead, he continues to pursue the competition through stalking and harassment.

This may go on for years in some cases, and it may include social media stalking, sending unwanted text messages, manipulating other people to make your life miserable and more. On your end, living with the long-term stress of harassment can wear you down, so you must find a way to remain strong regardless of how long his torment continues.

A narcissist believes that he is perfect. There is no room in this line of thinking for him to accept responsibility for the failure of the relationship. Many narcissists are also unwilling to accept that things simply did not work out.

Instead, a narcissist may do his best to ensure that he is not viewed as the cause of the broken relationship. He wants to maintain his clean, perfect image. In order to do so, finger-pointing can become excessive.

He may make hurtful accusations against you, and he may publicize these accusations to others so that he can control the message regardless of whether that message is true or not.

While he may be harassing you and spreading malicious lies about the nature of your breakup to others, do not be surprised if he pops up to meet you in public places from time to time.

Because he cannot accept the breakup that he views as a personal failure, he may periodically show up in places where he knows that you will be. During these times, he may be charming and try to lure you back into the relationship.

He may also show up with another woman in an attempt to make you jealous. This can be emotionally hard because you still may be trying to move on and let go. To avoid these situations, avoid posting your whereabouts on social media. Ensure that he has no way of knowing where you will be or who you will be with.

Another approach that a narcissist may take is to burden you with heavy guilt. For example, he may try to remind you of the good times that you shared. Perhaps he will remind you of all of the sweet things he said, the kind things that he did and the plans that you made together for the future.

While your relationship understandably had its high points, you cannot lose sight of the fact that many of these words and actions were clouded by his ulterior motives and manipulative behavior. You must hang onto your big-picture view of the relationship and avoid feeling guilt as you heal from the pain and move on.

Narcissists do not simply let a relationship go. They want everyone to know that they were not at fault, and they want your mutual acquaintances to take sides. More than that, they may try to intentionally turn your mutual friends and perhaps even some of your own family members against you.

To do so, your ex may publicize your private matters and secrets.

He may use social media and word-of-mouth gossip to taint the truth or even to spread bold-faced lies. His goal is to generate sympathy for him while making you look as bad as possible.

Each narcissist is different in various ways, and your ex may attempt to use these tactics to varying degrees. As you leave the relationship, you must identify these tactics as they are used against you. You may be able to anticipate and thwart some of them. In some cases, however, you will need to turn the other cheek and take the higher road.

When you give in to these tactics, you are giving him the satisfaction that he seeks. While it can be difficult to end this type of relationship and to move on with your life, you will ultimately find yourself in a better place through the effort.

Leaving a narcissist is rarely easy to do. What are your experiences from a breakup with a narcissist? We want to hear your stories. Do you know anyone who is in a similar situation? Make sure to pass on this to them.