Thief Finds Funny Letter From Reddit User In The Honda She Stole

May 26, 2018 by apost team

If you’ve ever had your car stolen, then you might know a little about Reddit user mfiasco’s struggles. If you also own an older molder Honda, then you likely know a lot about mfiasco’s desire to write future car thieves a pleading note. It’s not like she asked for a lot - just a good drop off location and maybe another misdemeanor.

Mfiasco’s note, which was originally posted on Reddit, has since gone on to become a viral internet joke of all seriousness. It’s so ridiculous that it’s impossible not to laugh at the plights of the thief, car, and owner, despite the seriousness of someone’s car being stolen.

Problem - mfiasco owns an older model Honda. Why is this a problem, you new car owners ask? Her worthless car keeps getting stolen - a lot.

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“I would love to afford a car that doesn’t get stolen and burglarized all the time, but I’m broke and this is what I’m stuck with. So, you got me. Again.”

According to Bankrate, Honda Accords are the top stolen vehicles in the U.S. Any guess what number two is on the list? Yep, a Honda, specifically the Honda Civic. Now, these two combined account for over 100,000 of the reported stolen vehicles per year, which is almost as much as all eight of the other most frequently stolen vehicles combined. You get the picture that Hondas are apparently like catnip to car thieves.

Mfiasco has accepted that her old Honda isn’t worth much to anyone but the thieves and is inevitably going to be continued to be stolen. She just wants a tiny little favor in return for her understanding attitude:

“One quick favor: please do not leave my car somewhere it will get towed. If I have to deal with one more f**king impound lot holding my stolen shi**y Honda for ransom, I am going to lose my mind. And my car, because I can’t afford to keep bailing it out of car jail. If I had any money I would just go buy a goddamned car that wasn’t constantly getting stolen in the first place.”

Who could blame her for this request? Having a car stolen comes with the annoyance of possibly not having transportation to work and, when recovered, making any repairs that the thief dropped in your lap. But, did you know that you actually have to pay to recover your vehicle if the authorities are involved?

“No cops, no questions asked; I’m not even mad at you. It’s win-win: I don’t have to deal with police reports, insurance claims, and tow trucks, and you don’t have to feel like a jerk for ruining the month of a nice person.”

The typical base fee for recovering a stolen vehicle is around $290. Owners typically have 20 minutes to get to wherever law enforcement find their vehicle if they want to avoid a tow fee. Otherwise, the vehicle is towed at a cost of anywhere from $180 to $300 dollars. The impound fees usually start at around $70. Storage costs start at around $40 to $60. Each day the car sits there is another storage fee, and everything has to be paid in cash before the impound lot will release the vehicle and stop tacking on costs. Basically, you’re looking at paying a few hundred to thousands of dollars just because someone stole your vehicle.

After experiencing this multiple times simply because her car is a worthless Honda that she can’t afford to upgrade and avoid thievery, It’s no wonder that mfiasco leaves this P.S. to her thief before wishing him happy driving:

“PS if you don’t mind committing another misdemeanor tonight, feel free to go throw a brick through the window of (redacted) Towing in Vancouver. They are literally the f**king worst....”

I’m not sure if the extra request was fulfilled, but mfiasco did post on Reddit that her primary request in the note worked. The thief apparently left her car on a neighborhood street where she was able to collect it without paying an extra $300 or so for her thief’s joy riding.

Ever had your vehicle stolen? Composed your own Dear, Mr. Thief letter? We’d love to hear your thoughts and stories and I'm sure your friends could use a laugh, too!