These 7 Signs Will Tell You If It’s Time to End Your Friendship
A recent study at Tel Aviv University showed that 95 percent of the participants considered their friendships as reciprocal, when infact only 50 percent of those that were polled, resulted in mutual consideration. The people that don't really value their friendship are either using their friends or trying to boost their image. That isn't to say this sort of friendship was never authentic. In many cases, two people that once were true friends grew apart over time.
In any case, if a relationship makes you feel uncomfortable, this is a sign that it may be time to end the friendship. Read on for 7 tell-tale signs of a toxic friendship.
1. You feel like you're in a competition with your friend's other friends.
This negative trait is a habit of toxic people. When someone doesn't truly value their friendship with you, they fail to notice how valuable you are in their life. When they speak about how other friends are better than you as a friend or as a person, this is how they truly feel about you. Though you may feel tempted to compete for the spot as the "better friend", it is best to put an end to this sort of toxic relationship.
2. Whenever you talk, your friend makes the conversation about their problems.
A one-sided friendship is difficult to overcome. In these types of relationships, one friend is constantly sharing about their issues, while ignoring yours. If you constantly find your need to be heard being dismissed, downplayed or ignored, this is a sign that your friend truly doesn't care about you.
3. Your friend never accepts criticism, but always criticizes you.
While honesty is an important part of all relationships, criticism should always be constructive. Instead of taking care to spare your feelings, a toxic friend will use this moment to humiliate you. Ironically, if you try to criticize them in turn, they may lash out.
4. You always schedule the meetings and your friend never takes the initiative.
Friendships are a two-way street. If both friends don't make an effort to communicate with each other, the relationship will fall apart. If you find that you are always the one reaching out, it is likely your friend isn't as invested in the friendship. Alternatively, if your friend is overly clingy and demanding, this is another sign of a toxic friendship.
5. Your friend is trying to change you.
While the truth is that friends should want you to be the best version of yourself, they should never try to change you. A friend that wants to mold you into their own version of who they think you should be is the wrong friend for you.
6. Talking with your friend is always an emotional rollercoaster.
If your relationship with your friend is always an emotional rollercoaster, this will take a toll on you in the long run. Toxic friends exhibit inconsistencies in their behavior and have a negative effect on the emotional and mental health of their friends.
7. You are careful not to make your friend angry.
Friends that are easily offended or angered by the littlest things are difficult to deal with. If you find that you are apprehensive or tense around your friend, this is a clear sign that this relationship isn't working out.
It's not always easy to end a toxic friendship. Why is it difficult? How do you end it?
While we think that it'd be easy to end relationships, it isn't always.
- We like to champion our friends' positive features. A person is rarely ever toxic all of the time. If their negativity only appears every now and then, it's easy to make excuses for them.
- Humiliating comments are hard to detect and are often said in a joking way, making it seem like a comment. Though hard to distinguish, these rude remarks often make you doubt if your friend is truly toxic.
- Getting rid of a friend is often lonely. The fear of being alone is a common reason why most people don't cut their friends off. However, loneliness is only temporary as you will find new relationships again.
- Sometimes toxic relationships are with our oldest friends. It can be difficult to want to let go of an old friend. However, the break up is necessary if you've both outgrown each other.
- Your feelings are difficult to understand. Wanting to cut off a friend is often a confusing feeling. It's normal to experience a range of emotions when dealing with a toxic friend.
- You think you deserve to be treated this way. We often accept what we think we deserve. If we think we shouldn't be treated well, it'll be hard to realize when it's time to cut off a toxic person.
- You have mutual friends. Having mutual friends with someone can make it difficult to actually cut them off. Though it's painful, it can be done.
The right friends make our lives happier and bring out the best in us. While we all want our friendships to last forever, sometimes that is impossible. You deserve the love that you often give to others.
Ever needed to cut a friend off? Let us know your story and leave a comment below.