Psychology Reveals Why Blunt People Make The Best Of Friends

Aug 22, 2018 by apost team

John Lennon said that being honest won’t earn you a lot of friendships, but that it would certainly earn you the right friendships. Most of us surround ourselves with “yes” people that tell us exactly what we want to hear, not what we need to hear.

Then, there are those few and far between friendships that involve tough love, brutal honesty, and saying “no” when needed. These are the ones to cherish because, just as they don’t compromise their honesty, they also don’t compromise their friends. Sociology studies confirm that blunt people make the best of friends. 

You may want your blunt friend to say they love your new haircut or boyfriend or that your right in some off the wall decision, but they won’t. They’ll be honest with you and tell you what you need, not want, to hear. Some people view such bluntness as malicious, cruel, and simply not being a good friend. In actuality, the blunt friend has your best interest at heart more so than the friend willing to appease and lie to you. They won’t spare your feelings at the sacrifice of your overall well-being. You won’t feel uncertain about the friendship or advice, and you’ll always know exactly where you stand.  
 

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People befriend others for all sorts of less than caring reasons - social climbing, mooching, to get close to someone else in your circle, convenience, or just because you’re available and there.

You’ll always be questioning where the person stands, what they want, and if they even really like you. With a blunt friend, you’ll never have to question their motives because they’ll tell you exactly why they’re friends with you. Blunt friends lay all the cards on the table so that the two of you can build an open, strong, and lasting relationship. 
 

Friendships often dissolve because one or both parties develop misunderstandings and repressed anger over little white lies building up and being less than forthcoming. It’s hard for either party to admit wrongs and apologize when the relationship is built upon insincerities. Blunt friends don’t have this problem because they openly express when they don’t understand, don’t like, don’t agree, etc. And, when they’re wronged or do wrong, they address the issues upfront, not repress anger and resentment over it. Should they be the one wrong, they’ll admit it and apologize. 

Many friendships are built upon ignoring or lying about the shortcomings they notice within each other. They don’t want to rock the friendship boat or hurt someone’s feelings with constructive criticism or truthful feedback. However, people can’t fix or improve what they don’t know needs it, and such can cause a friend to proceed with serious flaws and mistakes unnecessarily because they assume it’s all okay. Your blunt friend, however, will set you straight and challenge you to be the best you can be. They’ll openly and honestly tell you when they think you’re doing something that isn’t contributing to the best you possible. As a result, you’ll be more driven and optimistic that your decisions are sound. 

Blunt people are typically fiercely loyal. They won’t tolerate wrongs and gossiping against you. They won’t smile to your face as they stick the knife in your back once you turn around. They’re not afraid to stand up for their friendship, even when it’s much easier to join the bandwagon or stay silent. 

Keep in mind that the above isn’t to say that you don’t have room for all sorts and degrees of relationships. It’s just important that you recognize that every relationship isn’t a friendship, and every friendship isn’t going to be as rewarding and beneficial as the ones you have with blunt friends.

What kind of friends do you have in your life? Have a friend that fits the blunt friend to a tee? Tell us about your relationship in the comment section.