Pregnant Woman Causes Scene On Bus After Man Refuses To Take His Hand Off Empty Seat For Her

May 04, 2022 by apost team

Reddit, a popular messaging board site, is known for its oddly specific subReddits that cater to everyone, from dog owners, grill enthusiasts, conspiracy theorists, and just about every other special interest to exchange stories and ideas. Posts seek help troubleshooting problems, identifying mystery items, and even asking legal advice.

One such advice-based subreddit is "AITA." The board describes itself as, "a catharsis for the frustrated moral philosopher in all of us, and a place to finally find out if you were wrong in an argument that's been bothering you." Posts have ranged in topic from disagreements over party invitations to divorce-inducing fights. Always, the audience weighs in on whether the poster is, in fact, wrong.

In April 2022, a thirty-year-old pregnant woman, who goes by the username "Tiredthriwaway55654," wrote on r/AITA asking if her recent bus behavior earned her this title. She explained how she takes "public transport to work daily" and is "always exhausted cause [she has} to work extra time to be able to afford basic necessities."

The OP also mentioned that she was "eight months pregnant" at the time of the ride and that the bus is often packed "but [she] get[s] lucky enough when decent folks volunteer their seats for [her.]" However, she was also careful to mention that she doesn’t "use [her] pregnancy as an excuse to get what [she] want[s] but people just offer [her] their places by themselves which [i]s kind and sweet."

However, one day, the OP boarded "the bus like usual but this time there's one empty seat." She went "to sit but [she] find[s] a guy in his business attire sitting there with his hand" on the seat, oddly, as if "resting it." 

Understandably assuming the seat was free for the taking, the OP said "excuse me and ask[ed] him to remove his hand so [she] could sit, but he tells [her] the seat was ‘taken.’ [She] ask by who and he says his hand." After this shocking and strange response, she admitted she "laughed a little but wasn't feeling well so [she] ask[ed] him to remove it so [she] could sit but he refuse[d] again."

At this point, "folks start staring." So the OP tells the man that she is "tired and needed to sit." The man "replies saying [her] pregnancy isn't his problem." She then decided that given her "legs were burning and [her] back was hurting," to "go ahead and sit on his hand." The man "freak[ed] out and trie[d] to removes it quickly while shouting at [her]. He then start[ed] arguing about how disrespectful [she] was to do this inappropriate thing and in public no less." She argued back "but then he gets off after saying [she] was being inappropriate and disrespectful." To make matters more awkward, "everyone stares at [her] and [she] just sit[s] there feeling a bit of shame about what happened."

She then writes how she told her "husband about this incident." Shockingly, he agrees, saying that she "did indeed act inappropriately and shouldn't have made this guy uncomfortable by sitting on his hand like that." He then told the OP that she messed up "and this was totally inappropriate despite [her] saying [she] was so tired of standing and was in desperate need to sit down."

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After her initial post, the OP also wrote a short "Edited To Add" or ETA section to clarify her story before letting the subreddit judges decide.

She reiterated that she does "get offered seats from others so [she's] being treated well most of the time" but unfortunately, and despite her condition, she runs "into some people who don't" offer her a seat. She also sympathized with the man, saying he "seemed to be upset about something," adding how she wondered whether "the argument probably made it worse."

The OP also questioned how maybe she "could've de-escalated by maybe talking to the driver." But, she also asserted that she is "pretty sure he didn't pay for the seat just to put his hand on it" because reasonably "who does that?" The OP also added that on that Wednesday "most of the passengers were younger folks," saying that normally she "would get a seat from older folks."

Defeated, she stated, "Pretty sure I was an a**hole here but we'll see."

The commenter instantly disagreed with her, however. One user even wrote, "NTA. I hope you farted."

Another advised to adopt their strategy, writing, "I do this thing with my cats where I sit down slowly if they're in a space where I need to be, and I say 'here comes the butt' and THEY MOVE." A third simply wrote, " Your husband is wrong."

One Redditor summed up the general reaction, saying, "You don't get two seats. Not for your bag, not to sprawl out or lay down, and not for your hand. He shouldn't have tried to take up an extra seat, and he absolutely should've moved the first time you asked...He's the a**hole." Thousands of votes, and endless comments later, the OP's post still has its "Not the A-hole" stamp emblazoned at the top. 

What do you think about the OP’s choice? Have you ever been in a similarly awkward situation on public transportation before? Let us know — and be sure to pass this article on to friends, family, and fellow moms-to-be!