Petty Husband Sparks Fight After Tossing Out All The Traditional Food His Devoted Wife Made For Her Family

Nov 04, 2021 by apost team

At the end of October, a recently married woman took to Reddit to ask whether she was wrong for refusing to cook for her husband after he threw out all the food in the fridge.

If the situation sounds strange, that’s because it’s more complicated than it sounds. According to the original poster (OP), her husband, whom she recently married after being in a long-distance relationship, is a fairly picky eater. For example, when the OP’s relatives come over and she cooks their favorite meals, he won’t eat the food and complains that there isn’t anything for him. What’s more, he refuses to eat the leftovers. Instead, the OP’s 31-year-old husband eats fast food until the leftovers are gone and his wife starts cooking again.

Both of her husband’s eating habits ultimately led to a fight after the OP’s family planned to come over for dinner.

Before they arrived, the OP cooked her family’s favorite dishes as she always does, but her relatives canceled at the last minute.

“Great now who's going to eat all that unwanted food?” the OP’s husband then asked.

Given that the OP didn’t want to waste the meal she’d prepared, she told her husband that she wouldn’t cook again until they’d finished the leftovers. The OP’s husband wouldn’t give in, however. He “blurted” out that he wouldn’t be eating fast food for the next few days while he waited for her to finish the leftovers.

That’s when the OP’s husband did something drastic: he threw out the leftovers, claiming that they smelled “funny.”

“I blew up on him calling him nuts and unreasonable to throw away edible food and let it go to waste just because he wanted me to cook fresh meals that he likes,” the OP explained in her post.

“He said I can't blame him because my family chose to not come and that they were the ones who wasted my efforts. I refused to argue further after I said he could've told me so I could send the food to my family instead of throwing it away. He apologized but only for not asking me first but he still says I went overboard by saying I won't cook for him again,” she added.

Redditors almost unanimously took the OP’s side, with some even suggesting that she leave her husband. The Reddit community also asked what type of cuisine the OP cooked.

“Let me guess, your family's favorite foods are non-European/American?” one user asked. 

In an update, the OP explained that she and her family are Asian and that her husband doesn’t like seafood or the “traditional meals” she cooks.

This added another layer to the OP’s story.

“Not to be rude but, why are you married (to) a low key racist? The way his attitude sky rockets by the presence of your family and (IMO absolutely phenomenal) Asian food,” one top comment reads.

“Btw I am fully aware it is 1000% me making an assumption, and by NO means do i mean any offense … But to be so opposed, that instead of making himself a fried egg sandwich, he'd maliciously waste your perfectly good food just to make a statement … He is saying the food you make, the food from YOUR culture smells funny period,” the Redditor added.

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Multiple users also noted that her husband was guilty of what’s called strategic or weaponized incompetence. 

“Strategic incompetence is the art of avoiding undesirable tasks by pretending to be unable to do them, and though the phrase was apparently only recently coined in a Wall Street Journal article, the concept is surely as old as humanity,” a Guardian article on the term explains.

Multiple Redditors argued that her husband is using the excuse that he can’t cook in order to “pressure (the OP) into cooking for him.” 

“Throwing away the food because he thinks that will force you to cook for him is even worse. You have been married for a couple of months and he is already emotionally abusive. Consider therapy to help you explore your feelings and whether or not this is a relationship that you want to continue,” one Redditor advised. 

Another Redditor wrote, “DIVORCE IMMEDIATELY,” before adding that his “stunt was nothing short of an abusive power control tactic.”

Since the OP’s post went live, it has received more than 1,500 comments and 17,000 upvotes. However, the moderators of the AITA subreddit had to lock the post, limiting further comments, due to “an inordinate amount of insults.”

While most users took the OP’s side, the comments section did have a few outliers.

“Your husband sucks because he threw away food you would have eaten. But you are also not without blame. You refuse to cook for him til the fridge is empty? Really? He has stated several times he doesn't like that food. Stop trying to change him,” one unpopular comment read.

That said, most of the more neutral comments received a huge number of downvotes from other Redditors, making the Reddit community’s overall position clear: the OP’s husband is a jerk.

Who do you agree with and why? Have you ever had a similar disagreement? Let us know — and be sure to get your friends and family members’ opinions.