New Mom Bans Siblings From Being Around Baby Because Her Name 'Triggers' Them

Sep 17, 2021 by apost team

Becoming a new parent comes with a lot of responsibilities but also a lot of excitement. While it can feel daunting having to pick out furniture for the baby’s room and making sure you have enough diapers on hand, there are some really fun elements that come along with entering parenthood. For many mothers and fathers, getting to choose their child’s name is one of the most exciting and meaningful moments in the early stages of becoming a parent.

A new mom gave birth to her baby back in 2020 and decided to name her daughter partially after her mother. Her mother’s name is Lia, and her baby’s name is Kalia. It was a cute way for her to always honor her mother. Although the new mom had siblings, she wasn't particularly close with them, and the three of them tended to disagree on their upbringing. The woman had always gotten along pretty well with her mother, but her siblings had a very different experience.

Fortunately, the three of them were usually able to get along with one another until everything came to a head one day. Both of the woman’s siblings refused to call her baby by her actual name no matter how much she insisted that they do. Completely frustrated with their adamant refusal, the woman decided that it would be best if her siblings just weren’t in her baby’s life, causing even more issues within the family. The woman went to Reddit in November 2020 to ask for advice and see if she was wrong for excluding her siblings from her daughter’s life.

Starting off her Reddit post, the original poster (OP) talked about what her upbringing was like and what her life is currently like. She explained that since her mom had her pretty late in life, she didn’t get the chance to really grow up with her siblings. “I guess she wasn’t a good mom the first time around, very neurotic and controlling, and she wanted a do over baby,” the OP said. She had heard a few horror stories about what her mother was like to her siblings, but she still loved her mom and appreciated her for all she did while growing up.

“I had a baby girl six months ago and named her Kalia, in honor of my mom, Lia,” the OP said. Her older siblings were completely taken aback by this and were actually furious with the OP for picking the name. The OP explained, “My brother kept making comments about that poor baby, and why didn’t I just name her Jezebel.” Her sister-in-law was also annoyed and automatically assumed that the OP’s baby would always be the favorite grandchild, and the OP would always be the favorite child. The OP’s sister took it worse than anyone, though, and expressed that their mother didn’t deserve to have someone named after her.

Fortunately, all three siblings were able to get along for the most part until their sheer dislike for Kalia’s name became too much for the OP to handle. “They are always nice to Kalia, but they call her K or baby,” she said. “I really don’t like K and I want her called Kalia.” The OP’s brother and sister weren’t on board, though, and claimed that having to say the “Lia” part of Kalia’s name was too difficult and made them upset.

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Even though the OP was persistent with telling her siblings to call her daughter by her real name, her siblings still refused. More and more people began calling the baby by the new nickname K — even the OP’s mother, despite how much it hurts her to do so. The OP decided that she had had enough. 

“Kalia is her own person and has nothing to do with whatever my mom did years ago,” she reasoned. “I finally told them if they can’t call her by her name, then they can’t be around her.”

The OP further explained that she planned to no longer invite her brother and sister over to her house and that she didn’t want them to have much of a role as an uncle or aunt to Kalia. Her brother was pretty nonchalant about the situation, but her sister was mad and claimed that the OP was being extremely insensitive.

Reddit users were not fond of the OP’s actions and let her know that she was definitely in the wrong for refusing to let her siblings be around her baby. Just because she didn’t have a bad experience with their mom growing up doesn’t mean that she should discredit her siblings’ feelings. 

One user commented, “Pick a nickname you don’t hate, and have a little sympathy for their very different experience.” Another user offered up a new nickname that seemed like a good compromise for everyone involved and landed on the name Kali. Ultimately many Reddit users told the OP that her daughter would most likely always have some kind of nickname and that she shouldn’t be so controlling about it.

Do you think this new mom was right or wrong not to let her siblings be part of her baby’s life because of the nickname they gave her? Let us know, and be sure to pass this along to your family members and friends, too.