Mother Imposes “No Sleeping With BF” Rule On Her Adult Daughter, Asks Online If She’s Wrong
May 14, 2021 by apost team
In the eyes of a parent, their child will always be their baby. However, one mother took that idea too far when she imposed a rule on her 25-year-old daughter stating that she was not allowed to sleep in the same bed as her boyfriend when under her parent’s roof.
Based on the mother’s account of the story, her daughter was respectful and went along with the rule, but when asked when she was returning next she responded that it may be several months due to the new house rule. The mother was outraged by this and decided to post the story on Reddit and ask readers if she was in the wrong.
The response was overwhelming. Over 4,000 people left comments on the post and in the end, it was determined by most of the people who commented that the mother was in the wrong in this case. The main problem, the group of commenters seemed to agree on, was that the mother was treating her daughter like a child and was not respecting her daughter’s agency to make her own grown-up decisions.
Another issue that was commonly cited by Reddit users was that the mother was in the wrong for claiming that her daughter didn’t respect her house rules. This is not true based on her own account of the story, in which she claimed her daughter and her daughter’s boyfriend slept in different rooms while visiting her house. What the mother could not accept was that her daughter would choose to not return instead of giving in to the request.
Based on what the mother said in her Reddit post, it seems like her daughter was trying to avoid confrontation by staying silent on the issue. “Neither her or her boyfriend said anything at the time, but later it came up that they don’t visit more often because we won’t ‘allow’ them to sleep together,” she wrote.
Some people also said that the woman’s behavior was unacceptable because she called her daughter a liar for not wanting to stay in her home anymore after the rule was established. “After all, it’s our house and our rules. My daughter agreed, but then said she’d still prefer to sleep with her boyfriend and thinks our rule is what’s actually ridiculous. She then tried to tell us that they still respect our rule. I pointed out that she was clearly lying about that, since she was withholding her very presence from her own family,” the mother claimed in her post.
She also added, “I said she was punishing us for having a very reasonable rule, and that she obviously doesn’t truly respect ‘our house, our rules.’ She changed the subject then. At the end of their trip I asked when we'll see them again, and was told ‘maybe the 4th of July, unless [they] make plans with [boyfriend’s] family first.’”
The woman made it perfectly clear why she thought her daughter was behaving incorrectly. “Some people seem to think we’re upset that she’s choosing to stay in a hotel room instead of with us. This is not the case. She’s choosing to avoid seeing us at all, instead of spending time with her family,” she added to the end of her post.
The Reddit post has garnered over 27,000 engagements, all agreeing that the mother in question was in the wrong in this situation. Users clamored to leave responses to the woman’s inquiry and they were not shy about sharing their reactions to the story.
One person pointed out that the woman was only considering her own point of view and was not respecting her daughter’s decision at all. “You’re allowed to make whatever rules you want for your home. But she also has the right to decide what she’s comfortable with and it seems like she’s made that choice,” they wrote.
Another user pointed out that the daughter was following her mother’s rule all along, and it was the mother’s fault for expecting her daughter to comply without an issue. They said, “She makes a rule against premarital sex on their property. Couple respects that and stops coming to a property where they would not like to follow the rules. Now she tries to say daughter is obligated to visit a place where she doesn't like the rules. Nope, doesn't work like that.”
It is important to remember that situations like this can really drive a wedge between family members. “Yeah, my parents don’t know about any of my relationships, and they won’t until I’m pretty sure I’m gonna marry someone. Because of people like [that],” a commenter shared.
Many Reddit users believed that in the future, there is a high possibility that the daughter may not feel comfortable sharing information about her life with her mother for fear of judgment and rejection.istockphotos.com/JackF
What do you think of this disagreement between mother and daughter? Do you think the mother was right about the rule? Let us know your thoughts and don’t forget to pass this along to your loved ones.