Mom Is Devastated After Sister Fires Her 4-Year-Old From Being A Flower Girl At Her Wedding, Later Learns It Was Due To Racism

Dec 03, 2021 by apost team

Weddings can be stressful for everyone involved, especially if you are related to the bride or groom. With so many duties to uphold and tasks to complete, nobody wants to deal with a bridezilla on top of all the work. One mother, who was a bridesmaid, was going to multiple dance practices and spending a ton of money on dresses so she and her daughter could be in her sister’s wedding. However, just weeks before the event, the sister said she no longer wanted her niece to be her flower girl. 

The bride’s niece is only 4-years-old and was really looking forward to being a flower girl at her aunt’s wedding. When the sister decided that her niece was not good enough to complete her tasks of reciting a poem and performing a dance, the little girl was devastated. Seeing their daughter so upset broke the hearts of the mother and father. The mom then decided she and her family will not be attending the wedding. When others heard what happened, many friends and family decided not to go either, including some of the other bridesmaids. 

After posting her story on Reddit and asking users if she was in the wrong for not going to her sister’s wedding and cutting off communication, the mother received a message from the wedding photographer. The photographer claimed that while in the bathroom they overheard the bride’s mother-in-law and aunt-in-law making comments about the niece’s race and using harmful language to describe the girl’s father. This led the mother to believe that the real reason her daughter was kicked out of the wedding was that she is not white. 

Keep reading to learn more about this story and to see what other Reddit users had to say about it. 

In her post, the mother explained the situation: “Apparently my four-year-old wasn’t doing everything right and she was afraid she was gonna ‘mess up Her version’ by saying the wrong thing or not doing the dance right on the day. I told her she was doing a pretty good job and everyone was always praising her.”

The sister was acting like a real bridezilla and blatantly said her niece wasn’t good enough to be the flower girl. “Sister giggled and said it’s not THEIR day now is it so it’s not up to US what’s good enough for her wedding. I asked her straight up did she think her niece wasn’t good enough to be in her wedding. She replied with not something as big as a flower girl but to attend,” the mom wrote.

After hearing this, the mom tried to give her sister time to change her mind but she did not. “Well, two days went by so I couldn’t put it off any longer. I broke the news to my child. Even though I tried my hardest and sugar-coated it as much as possible the news still broke her heart. She cried herself to sleep (so did I and my husband),” shared the mother.

In an update to her post, the mom added: “My sister’s photographer saw this post and reached out to me … this goes deeper than my daughter not dancing right apparently she overheard my sister’s mother-in-law and aunt-in-law talking in the bathroom, they used slurs against my daughter and husband … So yeah my daughter wasn’t flower girl because unlike me, her aunt or the other flower girl, she doesn’t have blue eyes and blonde hair.”

apost.com

Many commenters were outraged and showed their support for the mother. One person said,  “OP was expected to bring the child to the celebration after being told she was no longer going to be the flower girl. Yay! She gets to watch another child do the thing she was so excited to do and not make a fuss. Get a babysitter? Great, watch her parents get fancy and leave to go to a celebration she is no longer a part of.”

They continued, “OP's choice to not go to the wedding was correct. Her immediate family is more important than her sister. OP did not tell other people to not go to the wedding, she told them what happened when they asked. Everyone made their own decision.”

A lot of users came to the defense of the little girl as well. “She had to do MULTIPLE classes for the dances, which is a ridiculous amount of time only to be told she can't be in the wedding. That's even more upsetting to the child, as she may think that she did something wrong to get her kicked out. Also, this girl is four. This is probably the most upsetting thing that has happened to her in her short life,” wrote another person. 

Others felt that the mother was not wrong for her reaction but should reconsider cutting off her sister. A third user said, “However if she's willing to rethink and go back to the way things were before, I'd let her. Not for her sake, but to model forgiveness and conflict resolution for your 4 y/o daughter.”

Would you forgive the sister in this situation? What would you have done if it was your daughter? Let us know and feel free to send this along to your friends and loved ones.