Man With Disability And Wife Dismiss Misconceptions And Show Their Relationship Is ‘Exciting’ And ‘Fulfilling’

Feb 14, 2023 by apost team

YouTube stars Hannah Aylward and Shane Burcaw document everything — from their first date to their everyday lives. The couple is used to sharing almost every part of their relationship. Though there's nothing new about a couple with a YouTube channel, Aylward and Burcaw are unique. The couple is interabled, meaning that one of them is disabled while the other is able-bodied. 

Burcaw has spinal muscular atrophy, and as a result, he is unable to walk or use his arms. His partner, Aylward, is a tall, blonde, athletic type, and she used to be a collegiate swimmer. She has no physical limitations to speak of. 

Though the pairing may seem unlikely, the couple is smitten with one another, and they don't hold back when it comes to sharing their love with their fans on the internet. They even post details about more intimate parts of their relationship, answering questions about sex and how Burcaw's disease affects it. 

Their channel, called Squirmy and Grubs, has over 1.11 million subscribers. But even before their internet fame, Burcaw had already established a media presence. In college, he started a blog called "Laughing at My Nightmare," which gained an impressive following. He later wrote a book about his life with the same title. 

In 2013, "The Office" star Rainn Wilson produced a short documentary about Burcaw. Three years later, in 2016, Aylward was a college student, and she found the documentary online. She emailed Burcaw, and the two began talking to one another all day, every day. The rest, as they say, is history. 

Burcaw published a second book titled "Strangers Assume My Girlfriend Is My Nurse" in 2019. In it, he described that despite what others may think, his disability made their relationship stronger.

"Because of my disability I'm forced to show vulnerability right away and our relationship is that much more intimate from the get-go," he said. 

Aylward spoke with Inside Edition about the same concept. "When we go out in public, people never think I'm his girlfriend," she said." I'm always assumed to be his sister, or his mom, or his nurse. And they'll talk down to him. So we were just sort of tired of that happening and wanted to tell people about it."

That same year, he asked Aylward to marry him. Burcaw wanted the proposal to be a complete surprise, and he successfully pulled it off. The couple got married in a small ceremony in September 2020, and they wanted everyone to see them as they see themselves — normal. 

Unfortunately, the couple has been the target of some harsh comments online. "People have said really bizarre things about me, that I have mental problems or I'm in it for a bad reason, (that) I couldn't possibly love Shane," Aylward said. 

However, the couple has remained positive and posts details, videos and pictures documenting their life on social media.

Burcaw told PEOPLE, "And so we're just trying to show people that our life is normal and silly and fun and disability is a part of it in the ignorance we face, but it doesn't inhibit our life."

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Burcaw also published a piece in TODAY titled "6 things I want you to know about our interabled relationship." He listed the points that he wants people to understand about his love for Aylward. He explained, "Because of the widespread and deeply-ingrained misconceptions about disability, people tend to see me as a child, or as someone who could not possibly be involved in a romantic relationship." 

He also shared an instance, "Hannah and I were once checking out at a liquor store when the cashier said to Hannah: 'Does this big guy want a lollipop?'" He continued, "I spoke up and said, 'Nope, just the beer. Thank you, sir.'"

Burcaw also shared that he wants people to understand that his relationship is not unique and that hundreds of other interabled couples have shared their own stories after watching "Squirmy and Grubs." He said that "the common theme of these messages is simple, yet profound: 'Our relationship feels so normal! Why can't the rest of the world see that?'"

Burcaw said:

"Many people have never seen a relationship like ours before, where one individual lives with a physical disability and the other does not. Our goal in sharing our lives with the world is to help normalize interabled relationships, to show people that our love is just as exciting, fulfilling and real as any other."

Burcaw clarified that they have a satisfying intimate life, and down the road, both of them want to have children. Burcaw also clarified, "Although I can't wash the dishes or fold the laundry, I contribute to our life in other ways," such as making appointments, calls and creating shopping lists. Essentially, "both perform equal physical and emotional duties to support each other." 

What do you think about this adorable couple's love story? Let us know, and be sure to pass this along to the hopeless romantics in your life!