Man Regrets Insulting Woman's Weight Because She Wouldn't Move Her Purse To Free Up Subway Seat

May 25, 2022 by apost team

In a 2019 post to the Reddit subthread, AITA, one Redditor asked if he was wrong "for insulting a girl's weight after she went off on [him] for touching her purse on a crowded train." On the surface, the situation sounds like a very uncomfortable, very public miscommunication; however, OP still worried he'd taken it too far. He outlined the altercation he'd had with said woman, which all started when he innocently tried to sit down in the unoccupied seat next to hers.

In setting the scene and beginning his post, OP wrote the "train [was] packed, it [was] hot, [and he was] tired." The already somewhat miserable ride was made even more stressful by the throng of occupants. OP continued, saying he started "looking for a place to sit." However, the train car was packed, and "everything was occupied." Still, OP lucked out, and "at one point [he saw] an old lady get up and start making her way to the doors."

Grateful to get off his feet, OP "went over to sit in [the] new place, but found a purse in it instead." He realized that it must belong "to the girl in the window seat." Not wanting to squash it, OP "asked [the woman] if she could move the purse." She "didn't respond." It was then that OP noticed that the woman "had headphones in." Not wanting to disturb her further, OP "figured [he would] just pick up the purse and hand it to her as [he was] sitting down." Wrong move. 

However, OP found that as soon as he "touched that thing, she went off on [him]." She gave OP "the most disgusted look" and took an appalled "tone, asking [OP} what the f*** [he] was doing." OP explained his intention of moving her purse so that he could sit. OP then relayed how the woman "then had the nerve to lie that she was keeping the seat for her friend." Not taking the bait, OP recalled how he "told her [he] knew for a fact she was alone because [he] just saw the old lady get up." Perhaps embarrassed for having been called out, the woman again "did not respond" to OP. 

Given the woman now definitely had no reason to keep the seat for herself, OP "started making [his] way down" into the seat. He figured the move would force the woman "to pick up her purse." If she again refused to move it, OP said he was fine with it being "crushed under [his] ass." The plan instantly backfired. OP's actions "released an even bigger tirade and series of 'what the f*** is your problem'-s" from the woman. 

OP then "saw another old lady looking for a seat and approaching" where the two of them were. At that point, OP said he had "had enough petty b***s***." He then "turned around to the girl - who was slightly overweight - locked eyes with her and told her 'Oh I'm sorry, I didn't realize you actually needed two seats to be able to fit. My bad, I'll get up now.'" This time, the woman responded.

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OP described "the huge shitstorm that [spewed] out of the girl's mouth." Ignoring her insults, OP walked away, offering the unoccupied seat to the approaching older woman. As OP moved, he "noticed some people [giving him] dirty looks." However, he also saw that "others were chuckling." With mixed messages from his audience of straphangers, OP took to Reddit. He ended his post by musing more than asking, "I kinda wondered if I stepped too much out of line there."

The commenters were split. Those that sided with OP seemed more entertained with the humor of the situation and did not necessarily pass judgment on his actions, particularly his choice of words. Representative of his side of the argument, one Redditor wrote, "NTA: Funny as f***."

However, others pointed out a flaw in their decision-making. One commented, "That's not a valid reason for an NTA judgement. Just because something is petty or 'I would've done the same' doesn't mean OP isn't TA." The Redditor went on, explaining, "OP insulted the woman after he got up and gave his seat to the old lady." This distinction meant his actions were "unnecessary and intentionally inflammatory." They concluded that the "lady was obviously a b****, but OP was too."

Whether you agreed or disagreed with OP's language, the commenters were certain that the real sin was the placement of the bag. One Redditor wrote, "I'm sick of people using an open seat for their purse." At least, in the end, there was something the whole thread could agree on. 

What do you think about people reserving more than one seat for themselves on public transport? Let us know — and be sure to pass this article on to friends, family, and fellow Reddit fans!