Man Expects His Ex-Wife To Become Mother To His Affair Baby & Makes Her Feel Guilty For Refusing

May 05, 2022 by apost team

When it comes to having a family, everyone has their own idea of what they want theirs to look like. Whether it be married with no children, or raising several kids with a partner, it’s really up to the individual to decide how they want to go about starting their own family. However, this is sometimes easier said than done, as one Reddit user by the username Honest-Wish7885 came to find out.

The user is a mom of four and loves all of her children dearly. Unfortunately, her marriage was not as happy, and it ended in divorce after she found out that her husband had cheated on her with another woman. The original poster (OP) explained how not only did her husband’s infidelity result in the end of their marriage, but it also resulted in the birth of what she calls “an affair baby.”

Just one year after the baby girl named Juniper was born, the child’s mother passed away. This has left OP’s ex-husband caring for his daughter mostly on his own, as well as still seeing his four children that he shares with OP.

However, Juniper has begun to take a liking to OP in the sense that she even refers to the woman as her mom. This has been incredibly difficult for OP as she is just constantly reminded of how her ex-husband hurt her in the past every time she sees the now-3-year-old. In April 2022, she went to Reddit to ask users if she was wrong for not wanting to be a motherly figure to her ex-husband’s affair child.

OP originally uploaded her post on Reddit, but it has since been deleted. Fortunately, it resurfaced on YouTube around the same time. In her post, OP asked, “AITA for saying that I wouldn’t be playing mom with my ex’s affair baby?”

She continued, “My ex-husband and I divorced four years ago because he cheated. He had an affair baby with the other woman but Juniper’s mom passed away when she was 1 year old. Aside from my ex-husband and his family, she doesn’t have anyone else because her mom grew (up) in the system.”

OP and her ex share four children: Joshua, 20, Cassidy, 16, Nate, 11, and Jacob, 8. After OP and her ex divorced, the older children cut off their father and have never met Juniper – something that OP’s ex blames her for. However, the other two still visit their dad frequently. “He might be an awful husband and partner, but he’s an awesome dad, I’ll give him that much,” OP admitted.

The mom said that it’s hard for her to separate Juniper from her ex’s “betrayal,” so she doesn’t spend much time with the 3-year-old. However, in a few recent occasions of picking up Nate and Jacob from their dad’s, OP was called “mama” by Juniper. She quickly shot this idea down, but it just resulted in the child crying.

OP’s ex-husband later asked if he could speak with her about her confusing behavior, as she is always loving and affectionate toward her sons but not toward Juniper. She explained, “So he asked me if I could just take her with me for a few days like I do with the boys and maybe, over the time, let her call me mom.”

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OP continued, “I said absolutely no, that I’m sorry for Juniper, but that I won’t be playing mom with her and that I’m only keeping a relationship with both of them because of our sons.”

Her ex pointed out how Juniper always cries whenever OP leaves without her, and even sent her a video of the young girl crying. However, OP was adamant that she wasn’t going to be a motherly figure to Juniper, and asked Reddit users if she was wrong because of this. Fortunately for OP, many users were on her side, but pointed out just how poor of a father her ex-husband seemed to be.

One user commented, “I disagree that he’s a great father. Cheating aside, a great father would accept his responsibility for his estranged relationship with his oldest sons and work to repair it. Instead he blames you. A great father to a motherless child would be working out how to meet her needs. Instead, he’s trying to manipulate you into a ‘quick fix’ by being her part-time mother.”

Another user said, “My. ‘awesome dad’ needs to tell his daughter NOW that you are not her mom, because he is making bad worse. It may be confusing now but with time and patience Juniper can adjust to reality. And your ex’s guilt-tripping is way out of line.”

A third user gave a helpful solution, and said, “There is another, simpler solution here. Let him pick up and drop off his sons while someone watches Juniper at home. Poor little girl. My heart goes out to her. But it also goes out to you, OP. This isn’t a mess of your making. No reason for anyone to stick the broom and dustpan in your hand for the clean up.”

What would you do if you were in this mother’s shoes? Let us know, and be sure to pass this along to your family members and friends, too.