Man Asks The Internet If He Is Wrong For Putting 9-Year-Old Daughter On A Diet

May 18, 2022 by apost team

It’s not unusual for people to want to be the healthiest version of themselves. However, this idea of health looks different from one individual to the next. For some people, healthy means eating particular foods and exercising for a certain amount of time each week. For others, it simply means feeling good about themselves and their lifestyle choices.

One dad has continued to be shamed by netizens for forcing his 9-year-old daughter to go on a diet. The dad explained that he and his now ex-wife divorced when his daughter, M, was five years old. Following this, he moved away and only saw his daughter during breaks but would speak to her on the phone pretty often.

A few years later, the father moved back and began seeing his daughter every other week. However, he noticed that M had started to put on weight and wanted to do something about it. He did his best to cut out certain foods as well as control her portion sizes, and take her to a family-friendly gym with him.

Unfortunately, this has caused M to develop a fear of gaining weight and a fear of eating particular foods. Because of this, the dad has wondered if he was wrong for putting her on a diet in the first place and turned to Redditors for their help in February 2020. It is safe to say that Redditors were furious with this dad for “emotionally damaging” his young daughter, who is still growing, and shut down his strict diet plan.

In his Reddit post, the original poster (OP) mentioned that when he saw his daughter in person for the first time in a while, he noticed that she had put on some weight. Even though it’s normal for children’s bodies to change as they grow up, OP was concerned about the way his daughter M looked.

“I spoke to ex and she got defensive, saying that M ate what she eats (ex is skinny and healthy) and has a sport she goes to twice a week,” OP said. However, OP didn’t think that M exercising for 90 minutes twice a week was enough.

“I know weight gets harder to lose the older you get so I decided to keep a close eye and do what I could on her weeks with me,” he explained. “I did not put her on a crash diet but I did start using a portion control plate and packing lean lunches instead of letting her buy her food.”

M’s food consisted mostly of veggies, yogurt and steamed chicken breast. She also began going to the gym with OP four times a week. “The only thing I said to M about it is that we were working to set her up for the future being physically fit and mindful of what she eats,” OP said.

When M was invited to a birthday party and asked to bring her own snacks, OP packed her with a bag full of vegetables and hummus. There was also going to be popcorn at the party. OP dropped M off at the party, and his ex picked her up.

apost.com

OP explained that the following day, he spoke with his ex-wife, who was not happy, and his daughter wouldn’t even look at him. Apparently, M had told the other kids at the party that they were going to get fat from eating their unhealthy snacks and that she had to eat vegetables to lose weight. She also refused to eat the popcorn and pizza that was served.

OP explained:

“M was crying saying that she was scared if she ate anything bad she’d put on weight and everyone would hate her.”

According to the National Eating Disorder Association, this is a fear that is sadly common among young girls. About 40% to 60% of girls ages 6 to 12 are concerned about their weight or about becoming too fat.

OP and his ex-wife got into a huge argument as his ex said that M was healthy and active, but OP said that her body didn’t reflect that. “Now ex is telling me she won’t send her back to me if I don’t stop ‘emotionally damaging’ her,” OP said.

He asked Redditors for their thoughts and was quickly shut down by them. Many people told OP that if he was really that concerned with his daughter’s health, then he would’ve taken her to see a doctor, dietician and/or nutritionist to come up with a proper meal plan and exercise regime. 

However, many users didn’t think this was OP’s intention. One user commented, “You only care about how she is perceived by others.” Another user said, “If your daughter is crying about her weight and scared to eat then you have gone about this poorly. This is the definition of ‘emotional damage.’ You may have good intentions but something is going very wrong here.”

What are your thoughts on this situation? Let us know, and be sure to pass this along to your loved ones.