In The End, My Only Regret Is Loving You More Than I Loved Myself

Jan 15, 2019 by apost team

With each relationship, women learn tough and often painful lessons about love as well as about themselves. The agony of a breakup may be more severe when women place their boyfriend above themselves.

It may be easy to blame your boyfriend for the failure of the relationship, but analyzing the mistakes that you made as well can help you to be in a better, stronger and healthier place when you settle into your next relationship.

If you are like many other women, when you fall in love, you fall hard. You put your entire body, mind, and soul into the relationship, and you do your best to make it work.

In some cases, you may prioritize your man over your own best interests. For example, you may make career decisions based on an anticipated future with this man. You may stop going to the gym or give up healthy eating because it interferes with your relationship in various ways.

Many women who are going through a breakup take stock of their lives, and they realize that they are only a shadow of who they used to be.

While it may be cathartic to rediscover yourself after a relationship, it is not necessary to give up so much of yourself and to forsake your future for the sake of a relationship. Regardless of how much you love your boyfriend or how hopeful you are for a future with him, you should not have to give up on your dreams and goals in order to be in that relationship. If you don't place yourself first, then who will?

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When you are in love, it is easy to trust what a man says to you. He may tell you exactly what he thinks you want to hear for numerous reasons. Perhaps he thinks that telling you those things will be easier than dealing with conflict if he says something that would make you unhappy. Perhaps he is hoping for the best as well, but it cannot realistically be attained.

But unfortunately, some men intentionally mislead women as well.

Through a rough breakup, you may look back and realize that so many of the things that he said to you did not add up. His actions did not align with those sweet words that he said. You may have made decisions based on those words, or you may have allowed yourself to fall deeper in love.

While cynicism and doubt have no place in a healthy relationship, turning a blind eye to the actual facts that are in front of you can be equally detrimental.

Some relationships run hot and heavy on both sides from the start, and they continue for years or even decades on even footing. Both members of the relationship are heavily invested and feel a similar level of passion. However, this is not the case in all relationships.

Many relationships involve one person who is deeply in love or even infatuated with the other person. The other person may have much weaker emotional ties to their mate. Some will end a relationship because of this, but others may allow the relationship to continue.

After all, it can be flattering to be on the top end of an unbalanced relationship. When you are on the bottom end of this type of relationship, however, you may feel vulnerable and as though you must constantly try your best to get the attention and love that you need and want. You may even feel that your love will carry your relationship through until he feels the same way.

After this type of relationship ends, you can feel first-hand how painful it was to constantly seek what was never available from the other person. You deserve to be someone’s priority, and you should not settle for less in a relationship.

It's easy to regret painful breakups, to wish you'd never met them and you could erase every moment spent together. But when we do that, we're wasting a valuable opportunity.

Instead of wishing you could erase your past, learn from it.

Figure out what you want in a man. Figure out how to find yourself again so when you meet your next dream guy, you can be sure if he's really the perfect person for who you've become.

What have you learned from your most recent breakup? Let us know in the comments and pass this along to your friends and family - especially if they've recently gone through a rough patch of their own.