If You Argue As A Couple, You Love Each Other More

Nov 27, 2018 by apost team

A relationship usually starts off being the best it can be. You agree with one another and do your best to compromise when it calls for it. Everything is lovely and you do your best not to fight. However, once the “honeymoon stage” is over, your individual opinions and differences come out.

This is when you probably start arguing and testing your relationship. If you can say without turning it into a screaming match, you can learn from each other. Arguing can be healthy in a relationship, provided it is done right.

Arguing is one way of communicating. It shows that you are an individual with different thoughts and opinions. You can teach each other something when you learn how to argue constructively. Arguments in a relationship do not always mean that there are problems.

apost.com

Sometimes, arguing right requires time and skills. Dr. Gail Saltz, a psychiatrist from New York Presbyterian Hospital, answered some questions, published in Today and offered five suggestions when it comes to arguing:

• Do not insist that you are always right
• Listen to your partner
• Speak up whenever you feel angry-don’t hold it in
• Never say something you will later regret
• Stick with the topic you are fighting about

An argument does not mean that the relationship is going downhill. Having disagreements means that the two individuals have their own opinions and ideas. They are able to bring them out into the open and share them with each other in a healthy way.

If you are in a relationship and do not argue, each person ends up with pent-up tension that threatens to explode in an unhealthy manner. They end up bottling up their emotions for fear of hurting the other person.

They may also end up lacking the desire to even engage with one another, or they may not be able to trust the other enough to have a disagreement. This is much unhealthier than just having an argument, to begin with.

If this is the case in your relationship, you should ask yourself if you are afraid of being yourself with your significant other. Are you scared of expressing your opinions and ideas? Do you fear ridicule or anger from your partner?

A relationship will always have conflicts and challenges. Once the two become committed to one another, most couples fall back into their own territory. They are eager to be heard and understood for who they are and what they like.

Couples who argue with one another are typically expressing their need to be heard. If the fight is done constructively, it isn’t really fighting. It is an expression of wants and needs. Couples who are happy in their relationship actually take the time to hear one another.

They will stand their ground with their partner and will not be afraid to express their true feelings. They won’t be scared to show they are vulnerable. They want their significant other to truly understand what they want and where they are coming from.

There is a big difference between an angry fight and an argument in which you express your thoughts and opinions. In a relationship, each person has to learn how to pick their battles. You know what is important to discuss and what you should let go.

Staying quiet when you are upset does not necessarily mean a healthy relationship. It only makes you bitter and angry when you don’t get to express your feelings and desires.

A relationship built on trust and love can stand an argument without angry feelings getting in the way. Both people should be able to show their different points of view to the other without fear of ridicule.

Many couples are also passionate after they argue. Some thrive on the passionate fight that they have and often have make-up sex when they are done arguing. Dr. Pam Spurr, a relationship expert, says that on a subconscious level, bickering can show that you truly care for your partner.

It is important to have mutual love and respect in a relationship, even when you are in the middle of an argument. Compromise is also a very important aspect of any solid relationship. Everyone has to meet in the middle sometimes.

You should also respect your partner. Just because you do not agree with their stance doesn’t give you any reason to insult or belittle them. You should be able to make your point without hurting anyone in the process.

An authentic relationship means being able to share what you believe in. Arguing can be healthy, as long as you know the proper way to do it. We hope this has helped you learn how.

Do you agree with this article? Let us know in the comment section below and pass this on to others who may need to learn how to constructively argue!