Guy Keeps Telling Girlfriend That She Smells, His Father Taught Him This 'Sure Fire Technique'
Nov 24, 2021 by apost team
When we first begin to date someone, there are social courtesies that we might pay particular attention to. Whether that's always looking perfectly put together or never having a messy apartment, it's normal that we want our potential partner to see the best sides of ourselves.
But unfortunately, there are some people out there who not only take advantage of this but also view dating as a game. Some even take this idea further and end up being manipulative to the people they date. Sadly, one young woman felt this first hand from her boyfriend of over one year, and it wasn't until she wrote into Reddit's "Relationship Advice" subreddit that she realized what had been going on.
After being told daily by him that she smelled bad, she began to feel paranoid. She eventually learned that this was a "technique" her boyfriend had picked up from his father, which he used to manipulate her all along. Let's take a look.
The woman began her post and said she'd dated her boyfriend for over a year and "everything had been great except for one thing. Every single day, at least once, he will tell me that I stink and smell of b.o. (body odor)." She said that when they met, she already "showered every day, applied deodorant in the morning, brushed (her) teeth three times a day."
But following her boyfriend's continued comments, she had become "so paranoid about smelling bad" that she upped the ante and began to shower twice a day, applied industrial-strength deodorant every few hours, which she set a reminder for on her phone, used perfume and brushed her teeth anytime she ate or drank something that wasn't water.
She admitted that she began to feel like she was "going crazy" since she didn't think that she smelled bad at the beginning of their relationship, nor did she smell bad after taking things up a notch. But she "obviously smell(ed) bad to him right?" She admitted that she had become more obsessive and that she was "that weirdo that keeps 'sneakily' smelling their own armpits." She also visited the doctor, who said that nothing was medically wrong.
"It has honestly gotten to the point where I literally shove my arm pit in friends and families faces asking if I smell bad, they all say I don’t smell like b.o. at all, one friend even said I smelled too clean like a lush store.
"I am getting so paranoid. He won’t cuddle or anything when he says I smell. I really don’t know what more I can do?"
The people of Reddit answered the woman, but soon after she gave her own update — and it blew everyone's minds. She wrote:
"I waited for him to make a comment this morning so I could talk to him. It was less than an hour after waking up that he said “god you stink” I had already showered and put on deodorant."
That's when the woman "snapped" and asked him, "what exactly was he smelling because, at this point (she's) one of the cleanest people on the planet and if (she) still smell(s) bad to him then (they) should just break up." His response was stunning.
She continued with this revelation:
"He got all panicked and upset, I eventually got out of him that this is what h(is) father always said to his mother. Apparently his father told him that i(t) was a sure fire technique to have a woman never leave you because 'she will feel too low to cheat, will love only you, and will always be clean.'"
Thankfully, the woman knew that this was not OK and ended things with him. She said:
"Needless to say, his father is wrong. He’s packing his things and moving out of my house today."
Reddit users were shocked at the truth. The top-rated comment said:
"Holy s**t, that update. His father basically groomed him to be an emotional abuser. So glad you ended that; hopefully he learns from this."
Many other users felt bad that the woman had to endure his emotional manipulation, but they were all very happy that she saw right through it and didn't stick around to give him another chance. Another person said, "OP (Original poster) upgraded for sure by dumping him."
People agreed it was "emotional abuse," while others also pointed it was "negging," which is a term coined by so-called pickup artists for this type of behavior. Negging, which comes from "negative feedback," is defined as "emotional manipulation whereby a person makes a deliberate backhanded compliment or otherwise flirtatious remark to another person to undermine their confidence and increase their need of the manipulator's approval."
Thankfully, the woman didn't fall for her boyfriend's toxic behavior. She responded to one comment:
For Illustration Purposes Only (With Models) — istockphoto.com/fizkes
"I realized that yes his dad did teach him this, but he’s almost 30. He’s met plenty of people and witnessed many relationships. He knows he can be better than this and he chose not to be."
What do you think about this story? Have you ever come across anything similar? Let us know, then pass this on to warn others of this kind of behavior.