Divorced Mom Saves Most Of The Child Support For A 'Rainy Day' And Asks If It's OK

Oct 20, 2021 by apost team

Separating from a partner can be challenging and incredibly emotionally draining, and it seems like the situation only gets more complicated when there are children involved. A mother found herself in a tricky predicament when it came to the child support she was getting from her ex to help care for their 4-year-old son.

More often than not, women fight hard to get child support from their ex-partners to help take care of the kids since the children typically live with their mother in these types of situations. Fortunately, this mother didn’t seem to be having any problem getting the payments from her ex but rather had a unique way of handling the money she received from him.

The mother surprisingly felt like her ex was giving her too much money. In fact, she rarely spent more than 30% of what she was given. Her ex had an issue with this, as he wondered what exactly she was spending the money on since she made her son live pretty cheaply. He had to walk home from school and rarely got new toys and clothes unless absolutely necessary.

She explained that rather than paying for luxuries or unnecessary items, she saved a bulk of the money in case of an emergency. The woman ended up fighting with her ex about this, so she went to Reddit on Oct. 17, 2021, to ask users to chime in with their advice on the matter. Read on to find out more about this financial situation and what advice Reddit users offered.

The original poster (OP) started off her Reddit post by explaining that her ex gives her a generous amount of child support every month, but she only uses about 20% to 30% of it. She explained that she was raised by a single mom, so she’s learned how to budget well. On the other hand, her ex grew up pretty well off.

“Recently my ex wanted to have a word with me because he didn’t like the fact that I made our son walk home from school,” the OP said. She didn’t see the point of buying a car and didn’t want to pay for a ride-sharing service, resulting in her 4-year-old son walking the 25 minutes to and from school every day. However, the OP clarified that she walks with him.

The OP’s ex accused her of making their son “live cheaply,” since she also wouldn’t buy him any of the sports equipment he had started showing an interest in. She explained, “I buy him ‘cheap’ clothes. I rarely take him to eat out and if we go to a toy shop, I only ever let him get one thing and it can’t be super expensive.”

The OP continued, “My ex wanted to know what I was using all of the money he gave to me on if I was raising our son like this, so I explained I never used most of it but kept it in a separate account for either a rainy day or for our son.” The OP and her ex fought about this, with her ex saying that she should start actually buying things for their child.

apost.com

Reddit users ultimately sided with the OP’s ex, explaining that she should at least start splurging a little on her son, or she should put the money away in a college fund. One user said, “Although I can appreciate the OP’s intention, this money is 100% for the child’s current needs. You do not get to gatekeep this support.” Another user said, “This is not your money, it’s for you son.”

The OP replied to clarify that she doesn’t use the money for herself. “Certain emergency situations will directly impact my son, hence why I said I could potentially use the money for a rainy day,” she said, explaining that they had an emergency situation earlier in 2021. She also mentioned that she plans to give the excess money to her son when he’s older.

Despite Reddit users claiming the OP was in the wrong in this situation, several users showed support in the comments section and gave her advice on small things she could change. One user said, “I don’t think it would hurt to splurge a little once in a while… Cheap toys can be the norm but a more expensive toy once in a while would be a healthy balance too.”

While it seemed like Redditors were torn about whether the OP was wrong in this situation, they essentially encouraged the OP to indulge once in a while to show her son some extra love but assured her that it was perfectly OK to save a good amount of money for her son’s future or in case there was an emergency.

Do you think this mom is right to save the child support she receives for a rainy day? Or should she spend more money on her son? Let us know, and be sure to pass this along to your family and friends, too.