Demi Moore’s Relationship With Ashton Kutcher Led To Immense ‘Devastation’ But She Has Reclaimed Her ‘Power’ Now

Apr 12, 2022 by apost team

Demi Moore has been a Hollywood actress for decades, ever since becoming a member of the so-called Brat Pack in the 1980s. Her roles in that decade include ensemble movies such as "St. Elmo's Fire," "About Last Night..." and more. But it wasn't until 1990 when she appeared in "Ghost" with Patrick Swayze that she had her leading lady breakthrough. The role garnered her a lot of praise and even earned her a Golden Globe nomination.

Ever since then she's dominated the screen appearing in movies such as "A Few Good Men," "Striptease" and "G.I. Jane.” At one point in the late 1990s, she was the highest-paid actress in Hollywood at the time. She later enjoyed a resurgence with supporting roles in movies including "Charlie's Angels: Full Throttle” and "Rough Night."

In the last few years, the actress has even diversified her work, as she released a memoir in 2019 titled "Inside Out." Never one to shy away from the camera, Moore has also begun modeling more often in the last few years. This includes editorial shoots, such as a swimwear campaign for the brand Andie, as well as walking the runway for various brands including Fendi and Rihanna's Savage X Fenty lingerie line.

Along the way, Moore has also opened up about her personal struggles that she’s faced, especially following her divorces. She has been married to musician Freddy Moore and actors Bruce Willis and Ashton Kutcher. Moore’s marriage with Kutcher was very toxic, but she learned many valuable lessons from their relationship and their divorce.

Moore has had a handful of public relationships over the years, specifically with Willis and Kutcher. She and Willis married in November 1987 after dating for only four months, according to Good Morning America. They went on to have three children together: Rumer, Scout and Tallulah. They later divorced in 2000. 

However, the pair were determined to make their children a priority through all of their hardships. “I think that we did a magnificent job of making sure that our children knew they were loved,” Moore said. Moore also told PEOPLE that she was “proud” of how she and Willis handled their divorce.

This was remarkably different from the way Moore went about the end of her marriage with Kutcher. The couple had met when Moore was 40 and Kutcher was 25. According to Good Morning America, Moore felt “responsible” for much of her life, and Kutcher felt like a “safe” space.

On top of that, Kutcher was successful and was establishing himself well in the entertainment industry. Most importantly, he loved Moore’s children. “I was not coming with baggage; I had trunks,” Moore said.

The couple began dating in 2003 and were married in September 2005. When Moore was 42 years old, she found out that she was pregnant, but ended up losing the baby six months into the pregnancy. She and Kutcher tried in vitro fertilization, but nothing came of it. At the time, she felt “lost, empty, desperate – confused.” Eventually, the weight of everything became too much and she turned to substances.

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Good Morning America reported that Moore later found out that Kutcher had cheated on her. “I really know that there are parts of what occurred with this relationship ending that were a level of devastation for me that wasn’t really about that relationship,” Moore explained. “It was really about my whole life.” 

She admitted she didn’t believe she was lovable. “It was about being the 2-year-old who wasn’t safe, that this really represented that I’m not lovable, that I’m not deserving,” Moore said. “And that’s not about him; that’s all just about me.”

Describing her marriage with Kutcher, Moore said, “I lost me. I think the thing if I were to look back, I would say I blinded myself and I lost myself.” After being separated for more than a year, Kutcher filed for divorce in December 2012. Moore filed her paperwork in March the following year, and their divorce was finalized in November 2013.

Following the release of her 2019 memoir “Inside Out,” Moore opened up about her past relationships and struggles, as well as the many lessons she has learned along the way. The book also detailed much of Moore’s turbulent childhood, something that she didn’t realize still played a role in her current life, according to Good Morning America. 

The actress had feared that she was no longer wanted, and ended up falling back into old habits after feeling like Kutcher was starting to drift away. “It’s kind of a natural thing to pull back when somebody’s clinging too tight,” Moore explained.

Moore also made a guest appearance on Jada Pinkett Smith’s series “Red Table Talk,” alongside daughters Rumer and Tallulah. According to Marie Claire, Moore broke her 20 years of sobriety when she first started dating Kutcher.

“The addiction and the codependency like my addiction to Ashton – that was probably almost more devastating because it took me seriously away emotionally,” Moore revealed. She continued, “Ashton said, ‘I don’t know if alcoholism’s a thing. I think it’s about moderation.’” 

However, Moore clarified that Kutcher wasn’t the cause of her breaking her sobriety, because she “wanted to be something other than who I am.” The actress added, “And I gave my power away.”

Speaking with Sirius XM, Moore talked about overcoming feeling lost and finally finding herself again following her most recent divorce. She said, “I think it’s a process of – not to sound cliche – but it’s really a process of learning to love yourself. Accepting who you are just as you are.”

Moore continued, “For me, I had changed myself so many times over and over to fit what I thought somebody else wanted… It’s that idea that we’re kind of conditioned to work toward being desired, but we’re not supposed to have desires of our own.”

It’s clear that Moore has learned a lot over the years from her past relationships and hardships, and is continuing to grow more each and every day. The actress noted that it was important to honor the love that first brought her together with her respective partner, and added, “But you can’t do that without really – that love and acceptance of yourself.”

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