Daughter Embarks On 'Bucket List' Journey With Father After He Was Diagnosed With Cancer

Aug 23, 2022 by apost team

There is a somewhat anxiety-inducing but often-asked question: what would you do if you knew you didn't have long to live? If a genie or a time traveler or a doctor suddenly gave you a date, what would you do with your limited time on earth? Summit Everest? Run with the bulls? Eat more bacon? 

When San Diego, California, resident Patrick Mitchell was diagnosed with stage 4 pancreatic cancer at age 72, though he was disappointed he would not be joining the centenarian club, he felt he had long enough left to still fit some fun in. His 38-year-old daughter, Vanessa Mitchell-Delmotte, decided she'd join her ailing father on his quest to add a bit more zest to his final month. 

Mitchell-Delmotte and her father then hatched a plan to complete a good old-fashioned "bucket list" of adventures with Mitchell's remaining time, ticking off whatever adventures they could come up with. However, the two felt a little lost about where to start. Limited somewhat by Mitchell's health and energy, they decided to appeal to their community for ideas. 

Mitchell-Delmotte wrote in the Facebook group, Coronado Happenings, asking, in essence, for bucket list items for a dying man. Cutting right to the chase, she asked, “My dear dad has stage 4 pancreatic cancer. I’m taking December off of work to enjoy some bucket list activities with him. Anyone have ideas?” Given the group has nearly 30,000 members, they figured they might get a few ideas that ranged beyond the typical tourist attractions. 

Speaking later to the Washington Post about her message, Mitchell-Delmotte said, “I liked the idea of doing something that wasn’t touristy; that you couldn’t Google." 

Prior to Mitchell's passing on Jan. 11, 2022, Mitchell-Delmotte wanted him to experience life's more unique adventures. She commented that he was the type who would want to be able to exclaim, " You’re never going to believe what I just did," after a bucket list item. The resulting response was something no search engine could have ever produced. 

Countless strangers reached out, offering all kinds of mostly local adventures: from a private tour of the helicopter hangar to a special viewing of “The Nutcracker" to a horse therapy session to a private surfing lesson to a family photo shoot, piano lessons, a painting session, and a staycation at a local hotel. All were offered free of charge. And all from relative strangers. Each person, they would learn, had their own personal reason for responding and offering some part of their life. 

Julie Wright was married to Justin Wright, a search-and-rescue swimmer, and offered a tour of a U.S. Navy helicopter squadron. Wright told The Post, “Having just gone through cancer and almost losing my own mother last year, I had a small sense of what Vanessa may be going through ... It’s never the same story, but I felt it. It hit me in the gut.”

Vickie Quinn thought of her son, Stephen Quinn, a quadriplegic who receives all kinds of help and kindness from their neighbors. She told Post reporters, "So much was given to our family — especially to my son — from the people in the Coronado community ... I thought this was the least we could do.” Perhaps hoping to inspire others, she added, “If you have an abundance of love to give, you should give it." 

apost.com

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