Dad Files For Divorce To Keep His Daughter Safe From Stepkids’ Bullying

Aug 18, 2022 by apost team

Jumping back into the dating scene after the death of a spouse is frightening and stressful, with apprehension and anxiety getting in the way of finding a genuine romantic connection. Many are still haunted by the pains of their past, which makes having closure and truly processing their feelings integral to being able to get back out there.

Some have the added challenge of having children, and juggling a love life and kids can be difficult. For example, when exactly is a good time to tell a date you have kids? How do you bring it up? Do you allow them to meet? 

All these little things can add up to make you feel like dating is a minefield, so why put yourself through it? This is why it is so refreshing when you finally find someone you can relate to, who shares things in common with you and with whom you can feel comfortable. 

Such was the case for one man who took to Reddit on July 28, 2022, to share his story about his second marriage. His first marriage had gifted him a daughter he loved beyond measure. When he met his second wife, they bonded as she also had kids from a previous marriage.

“I was a widower when I met my wife 4 years ago. She was a divorced mom of two. I had a daughter also. The three girls are 13 and 11 (my stepdaughters) and 12 (my daughter). My wife’s ex was kind of an issue when we met, but it was easy not to expose my daughter to him, so I felt secure in moving forward. My daughter really liked my wife and was excited to maybe have siblings,” he wrote. 

But his hopes of a happy blended family soon crumbled.

The man said, at first, that his daughter and his wife’s two girls got along well. 

“My stepdaughters were fine with my daughter at first. Of course they didn’t just call her sister magically or treat her the same right away but they were nice,” he shared.

All that changed a month after they married.

“The girls’ dad hates my daughter and they (the girls) will spew that hate in our home, and will use it to bully my daughter. A grown a** man called my 10-year-old a fat repulsive pig, a w***e and the reason abortion was invented (to list only a few). The girls have called her dumb, they have mocked her for being shy and introverted,” he added.

He tried to nip the problem in the bud with his wife’s help.

“I made it clear that could not continue if we were to stay married and my wife was determined she would get them to stop. I got my daughter therapy and I did as much as I could to keep them separate. But even at night, they started to taunt her. So I made the decision to move out with my daughter and I told my wife our marriage could not continue. She begged me to stay. She said she loves us and her girls need me. I said my daughter comes first.”

His wife’s family wasn't content to see him go.

“Ever since I filed for the divorce my wife's family have been telling me how much my stepdaughters need me, how badly they need to see a healthy and good father figure in their lives, and that I will destroy them if I leave.”

But he refused to placate them at the expense of his daughter’s happiness.

apost.com

“They said my wife was prioritizing my daughter and being loved by her should be enough for her to understand her sisters need me to stay in their lives. And I am an a*****e for saying their granddaughters are not special. … they said I dismissed two young girls and made it sound like they weren’t worth fighting for,” he wrote.

The Reddit community rallied behind the distraught dad.

“You did the right thing – the only harsh and cruel thing said in that conversation was them implying that you were somehow harming your stepdaughters by choosing to protect your own child from their bullying. The girls may indeed need a healthy father figure in their lives – but if you had stayed in that house and allowed their torment of your daughter to continue, then you no longer would have been the example they needed,” one commenter reasoned.

Many pointed to the wife’s ex as the main cause of the issue.

“You, unfortunately, cannot control the amount of poison the ex is spewing, and despite your wife and in-law’s efforts, there’s not much you can do to fix it. … I understand why your wife and her family are so upset, but you do have an obligation to your daughter,” one comment read.

“I wouldn’t be that hard on the ex-wife. She’s tried to discipline the girls, but she’s up against them being indoctrinated into toxic behavior the other half of the time. That’s a near-impossible fight once he’s gotten in their heads,” another commenter added.

When one commenter wrote, “I think your wife and in-laws view you leaving as letting the ex ‘win,’” the father had a final response:

“Possibly. But he ‘won’ the second my daughter was hurt by his and his daughters’ words so.”

What do you think of this man’s actions? Do you believe he is overreacting or doing the right thing to protect his daughter? Let us know, and don’t forget to pass this on to all the doting dads you know.