Bride Receives Backlash For Wanting Child-Free Wedding That Excludes Her Soon-To-Be Stepson

Jul 07, 2022 by apost team

Planning a wedding can be pretty stressful, but fortunately, most people have their families and friends to rely on during this time. It’s common for the bride and groom to want everything to go as flawlessly as possible and make their wedding everything they could have hoped for. From picking out gorgeous flower arrangements to composing the perfect, romantic playlist, wedding planning certainly has all the makings of being everything a couple could dream of.

More couples nowadays are choosing to have child-free weddings in an effort to keep everything running smoothly and to allow the adults to have a more sophisticated and mature atmosphere. However, this can cause issues depending on the situation.

One bride went to Reddit in April 2020 to share some frustrations she was having regarding her wedding planning. She explained how she and her fiancé were in agreement about almost everything pertaining to their wedding except for one aspect. While she wanted to have a completely child-free wedding, her partner wanted to make a few exceptions — and important ones at that. He wanted his son and his niece to be there on his special day.

This turned into a huge issue for the soon-to-be husband and wife as they were both headstrong about standing their ground. Wanting some advice on what to do, the bride turned to Reddit users by using a throw-away account, where she asked them if she was wrong for not wanting to include her future stepson. Unfortunately for her, many users were not happy with her stance.

Starting off her Reddit post, the original poster (OP) asked if she was wrong for asking her soon-to-be husband for a child-free wedding. She explained that they had been together for about two and a half years and were set to be married the following year. “We have been pretty much in agreement over most of the wedding planning except this one thing,” OP said. She continued:

“I told my fiancé that I would like to have a child-free wedding because I do not want babies and little ones screaming, crying or running around during our ceremony and reception. This is our special day and I do not want that annoyance. Especially during vows!”

While OP believed that she made some good points about why she and her fiancé should opt for a child-free ceremony and reception, her future husband had other plans. “My fiancé, however, said that he wants his 11-year-old son and his 4-year-old niece to be a part of the day and be in the pictures and whatnot,” OP explained. “I told him that I understand this, I really do. But I want this to be elegant. Not like a backyard barbeque.”

OP had more concerns as she wanted to ensure that all the attention was directed at her by not just their wedding guests but especially her soon-to-be husband. “I also told him that I want to be his focus on our big day and feel his son especially will want most of his focus as he always does when he is around,” she said.

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OP shared more of the conversation she had with her fiancé. “He says he will try and prioritize me but I know how it will go,” she said. “My soon-to-be stepson will whine and literally cry until he gets the attention.”

OP asked Reddit users if she was wrong for wanting a child-free wedding, and many of them replied that while she wasn’t wrong for wanting that type of wedding, she was completely wrong in this situation.

One user commented: “You don’t want HIS SON to be at the wedding? As in your future stepson? That is over the top narcissistic and selfish. There could generally be a compromise on a child-free vs not but not when the couple has a child.”

Another said: “That’s his son. Your new stepson, btw. However, that’s not the problem here — the problem is that you feel second to his child and that you feel his son is an entitled brat, correct? Have you talked about your fears and needs with your fiancé or did you merely demand a child-free wedding?”

A third user pointed out that OP could have a mostly child-free wedding aside from the two kids that her fiancé wanted to be there. The Redditor said: “I don’t care if you don’t want kids at the wedding or at any point. Hell, I have none. But this is his son. Your future stepson. And kids at a wedding isn’t an all or nothing thing. Your future husband and you get to set the rules. If he wants the two kids there, let the two kids come and say no to the others.”

What do you think about this bride’s request for her wedding day? What would you do if you were in this situation? Let us know, and feel free to send this to your family and friends.