Bride Considers Deleting Friend's Engagement Photos Because They Were Taken At Her Wedding

Jul 28, 2022 by apost team

Getting married is a momentous decision in a couple’s life together. Their wedding day will most likely be filled with love and happiness as they are surrounded by their closest friends and family members. It’s certainly a day that the happy couple will remember for the rest of their lives.

While weddings are typically a joyous occasion, there are a few unspoken rules that most people know to follow on the big day. For starters, most people know it’s a cardinal sin to wear white on a wedding day unless the dress code specifically calls for it. Another unspoken rule is not to do anything to steal the happy couple’s spotlight by doing anything super extravagant, like getting engaged. Unfortunately, one bride’s friend seemed to ignore the latter on her special day.

In July 2020, a bride went to Reddit to ask users if she would be wrong for deleting her friend’s engagement photos. While it seemed like a cruel ask, her story won people over, and many users were on her side. The bride explained how she had a very tight budget for her wedding and was lucky enough to have a friend of a friend be her photographer for the day. However, it turned out that the photographer not only captured some wonderful moments of the wedding but also of her friend’s engagement. To top it off, the bride didn’t even know that her friend got engaged at her wedding until some time later.

Once she received the photos, the bride was unsure what she should do with them. It dug up some old scars that she thought were healed from her up-and-down friendship, so she asked Reddit users for their advice.

In her Reddit post, the original poster (OP) talked about how important it was to have beautiful yet affordable wedding photos. “I got married last fall,” she explained. “Where I live, fall means the trees are changing colors. So the wedding pictures are to die for.”

OP explained that she and her partner didn’t have a huge budget but were fortunate enough to find a friend of a friend to be her wedding photographer. The work was good, and the photographer was very kind. “The only thing is, for what she charges, and since it’s more of a hobby, you’ll get your pictures when you’ll get them,” OP said. “Well, I got them.”

Her friend told her she was engaged a few days after OP’s wedding. “I was ecstatic and wanted to know everything,” OP said. “Turns out she got engaged at my wedding.” 

Needless to say, the bride wasn’t thrilled about this as her friend had announced it at her wedding reception but kept it from her. OP explained, “We did have a discussion about it, and she didn’t seem to understand why I was upset until I put it into perspective for her, asking her how she would feel if I made a big announcement at her wedding, taking the attention away from her big moment.”

Thankfully the pair was able to make up and move forward. However, OP has been friends with her wedding photographer since her wedding day and recently received some upsetting news. When she got her wedding photos, she also got her friend’s engagement photos. 

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The photographer took engagement pictures for OP’s friend while everyone was still at the wedding but didn’t fully realize what was happening until she was already in the middle of taking the photos.

OP explained, “So, when she asked me what to do, that, you know, accidents happen, I told her to just put them in a separate folder. Ever since, I’ve been thinking what am I gonna do with that folder. My friend has been asking about my wedding pictures periodically but (hasn’t) asked about her pictures specifically.”

The bride was conflicted about what to do. “I want to delete the folder since they are my property anyway,” she explained. On the other hand, though, she didn’t want to do anything rude. “I do realize I haven’t forgiven her at all like I initially thought,” OP admitted.”

While many Reddit users agreed that OP would be cruel for deleting her friend’s engagement photos, most still supported that decision. One user summed it up well and said:

“She cheated you out of money. Be it hundreds or thousands of dollars. Wedding photos cost money, engagement photos cost money. Moreover she KNEW what she was doing when asked the photographers to take those photos.” The user also suggested that OP sell the engagement photos to her friend at the photographer’s rate.

OP replied, “I didn’t actually consider that, although it was definitely not thousands of dollars. Like I said, our budget was pretty tight and she doesn’t charge nearly as much as she should for the work she does. I think it is worth exploring though, asking her how much she would have charged for it. And from there I’ll have a better idea of what to do.”

Do you think getting engaged at someone else’s wedding is wrong? What would you do if you were in this bride’s position? Let us know, and feel free to send this to your friends and family.