13 Habits That Often Lead A Happy Marriage To Divorce

May 28, 2018 by apost team

Author Leo Tolstoy once wrote, “happy families are all alike; every unhappy family is unhappy in its own way.” This is certainly the case of those who have been divorced. From lack of communication to infidelity to intimacy problems, each divorce is unique with its own problems. But there are some similarities between those who have been divorced. If you want your relationship to last, make sure to get ahead of these problems before they sink your relationship.

Even in healthy relationships, couples argue. When you argue, it shows that each person is communicating their needs even if those needs involve airing grievances about the other's behavior. When couples no longer argue, it shows that they are either so checked out of the relationship that they don’t care either way or that the couple can’t communication about difficult topics.

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When you fight, remember that it is not you vs. your partner, it is you and your partner vs. the problem. When couples fight each other, things can get dirty. Don’t attack your partner’s personality or personal views, as it shows a lack of respect for your partner and unhealthy methods of communication.

Communication is the cornerstone of a healthy relationship. Constant and healthy communication requires talking to your partner about things that are bothering you. Those who have been divorced often bottle up their feelings or complain about their partner to friends and family instead of communicating with their partner directly.

When fighting with your partner, you need to put yourself in their shoes and try to understand their point of view. Those who have been divorced often jump to conclusions and show distrust towards their partner when in an argument.

When the relationship problems increase, couples may try to save their relationship by taking drastic measures that don’t actually address the root of the problem. Couples can do things like try to get pregnant or get married in hopes that it will solve problems. Unfortunately, this often backfires and the relationship worsens with the added stress.

It’s hard to save a relationship where partners don’t trust each other. Often it requires help from an outside party like a therapist or couples counselor. But a marriage without trust won’t last long.

After a bad day at work, do you talk about it with your partner or do you take it out on them with negativity and snarky comments? By acting immature whenever you’re in a bad mood, it shows a lack of emotional maturity and a lack of healthy coping skills, both of which are essential in healthy relationships.

When you’ve been hurt in the past, a common way to shield your feelings in a new relationship is to not invest in it emotionally. But when it comes to marriage, if you’re not giving it your all, it will fall apart and lead to things like cheating and boredom.

Marriage is work. There’s no way around that fact. But the important part is to never stop trying. Those who’ve been divorced often stop trying after marriage. This can include things like no longer giving gifts, not going on dates, or even neglecting your health and appearance.

When the relationship is new and exciting, everything your partner does is amazing. But after years of marriage when the puppy dog phase fades, it is easy to overlook all the little things your partner does to make you happy. For things like making soup when your sick or making your favorite dinner after a long day, make sure to show appreciation for all the things your partner does for you. If you take your partner for granted, they’ll want to leave and find someone who appreciates them.

While maintaining your identity in a relationship is healthy, you should also consider you and your partner a team. By being an “I” instead of an “us”, you’re putting yourself ahead of your partner and your marriage.

Actor Malachy McCourt once said, “resentment is like drinking poison and waiting for the other person to die.” Resentment is poison to relationships. When you don’t discuss things that are bothering you, those feelings grow and grow until you end up hating your partner.

Intimacy and physical attraction are essential to a healthy relationship. And this isn’t only about sex. When couples stop holding hands, cuddling in bed, and kissing passionately, it shows a lack of passion. Flirt with your partner and be intimate with them to show that you still find them attractive.

Do you recognize these behaviors in your relationship? Resolve them before they kill your marriage. Post these habits of divorcees to let your friends analyze their relationship!