Why Some People Simply Can't Stand Being Hugged, According To Science

Jun 26, 2019

While some people thrive on physical touch, others shy away from that type of affection. Experts say that your view on hugging is often greatly influenced by your childhood upbringing.

Those people who grew up in households that did not readily give out affection through physical contact are more likely to shy away from it as adults. Likewise, those people who were raised with an abundance of physical affection are more likely to make it an integral part of their lives as adults. Dr. Suzanne Degges-White Ph.D. writes in Psychology Today, "Our tendency to engage in physical touch — whether hugging, a pat on the back, or linking arms with a friend — is often a product of our early childhood experiences."

A 2014 study followed the growth of Romanian orphans who were not touched often and therefore made it difficult for them to pick up social cues as they went through life. The bottom line is that your experiences as a child can greatly influence your views and openness toward hugging as you age.

Another factor that affects a person's willingness to hug is related to their cultural upbringing. Dacher Keltner cites a study in Greater Good Magazine that found Americans and British people are less likely to embrace in social situations, but people in Puerto Rico and French citizens are more likely to feel comfortable with this expression.

One of the greatest benefits of hugging is the boost that this physical contact delivers to the immune system. A Carnegie-Mellon study has shown that those people who feel love are less likely to come down with colds and other illnesses.

What most people agree on is that you have the right to deny a hug if you are not comfortable. Everyone's personal space deserves to be respected. It is important to be able to read the cues of those around you before going in for hugs. If you are ever in doubt if the touch will be welcome, it is always better to err on the side of caution and not initiate the hugging.

Do you love to be hugged? Or does it make you feel uncomfortable at times? Let us know in the comments and be sure to pass this message along to others. It is important to understand why some people may embrace hugging in the fullest way while others shy away from this type of expression of emotion.