10 Mistakes That Might Ruin The Relationship Between You And Your Boss

Jul 04, 2018

A lot of research has gone into the dismantling and dissolve of personal and romantic relationships, outlining the real meaning and context behind almost every communication mistake imaginable. However, not so much is said about the real meanings behind “it just didn’t work” when it comes to communication within professional relationships breaking down and ultimately dissolving.

Considering many people think of the employer-employee relationship as one of the most invaluable in life... after all, that job is what pay the bills and supports all other facets of life... it’s important to understand the dynamics behind what goes wrong between employees and their bosses. So, what are the big mistakes employees make that lead to communication errors and dissolving employment? Let’s explore 10 of them: 

Whether it be an emotional story about your need to avoid foreclosure or an entitlement you think you need in a new car, roof, or wardrobe, your boss most likely doesn’t care about your personal needs. While a few companies value the personal happiness of employees in such that it relates to their efficiency and productivity transfer at work, most retain the old school bottom line that your salary is based on current performance and agreements, not your personal needs. That’s not to say that dire times shouldn’t mean you speak with your employer about your options, but, as a general rule, you should keep your needs out of expectations for raises. Performance trumps searches for pity when it comes to raises. 

Unless your job involves a schedule whereby you leave after you’ve completed certain tasks for the day, keep requests to leave early for emergencies and the rare special occasion only. Otherwise, you’re raising multiple red flags that aren’t in your best interest, such as your position isn’t needed or not needed to the capacity it’s currently filled since you’re always leaving early , you lack self-motivation and teamwork skills, or you need to be given more tasks to share the office’s workload. 

There are times when errors and neglect have to be assigned blame so that you don’t take the reprimands for something you weren’t responsible for doing or not doing. That said, we all know that worker who never takes responsibility, points fingers at others, justifies everything, tattles every five seconds, and makes professional situations into personal attacks. They’re never wrong and never to blame. Don’t be that employee. Professional trust and respect are earned by both doing good work and by admitting when something isn’t up to par or a mistake was made. Admit faults, be part of the solution, and assure the boss that the same mistakes won’t be repeated. 

Threats to leave and quit do not bolster your position or point of professional contention. You can only throw so many tantrums before you become the little boy crying wolf, and do keep in mind that there’s no such thing as an irreplaceable employee. If you’re lucky enough to find an employer willing to let you do this act more than once in the first place, you’ll soon find that even the most tolerant employer will eventually lock the doors you slam in their face. It’s okay to say that you have a different opinion or that you’ve decided this job isn’t the right place for you, but don’t make decisions you can’t or don’t intend to carry through. 

It doesn’t matter what you’ve always done or what former people in charge did or allowed. The only thing that matters is what the current boss says must be done. Ever told a current lover that your ex or mom does something x,y,z way and that’s the better way? Yep, this is that kind of disaster. Your boss doesn’t want to be compared to an ancestry of reigns before him. He doesn’t want your excuses or rationale on why his chosen way doesn’t work for you. If you don’t have facts, and those facts shouldn’t be purely self-serving your own laziness or inability to adapt to change, on why your boss’s method of operation could cause undue difficulty, then you better adopt a more flexible thinking style if your job is valuable to you. 

Translation of “I’ll try” between employee and employer is that the employee isn’t going to do what’s asked and wants to avoid responsibility at the end. Employers want active and assertive employee voices. If it’s something you can do, but maybe don’t want to do, then take the initiative to show your employer your value by both agreeing to and doing the job right. Be honest about your abilities and probable difficulties if you’re assigned a task out of your wheelhouse. 

You may be busy or you may just not want to do the task, but you shouldn’t ever make the mistake of telling you’re boss you’re too busy to do what’s asked of you. Instead, if you truly are swamped, then you ask for clarification so that you can prioritize and stay on the same page as your boss and coworkers when it comes to goals and objectives. Discuss your current work demands and if and how they should be lowered in priority to accomplish the new task. 

Remember the kid who told all the expert adults trying to get a truck stuck under a bridge to stop trying to pry it out and just deflate the tires? It wasn’t his problem and he didn’t have expert knowledge, but he solved a problem that benefited everyone stuck in the traffic jam. 

As part of an organization, every single problem a company faces is potentially your problem since it can ultimately impact the company’s stability and therefore your job. 

Now, that’s not to say that your role as a courier means you should prance into an executive meeting to give your opinion on PR for a salmonella outbreak. But, what you do want to always show is initiative and interest, not act like you’re in a solo boat while everyone else is rowing toward team success. If you think you have something beneficial to offer, speak to your boss. You never know when it’ll be your idea that provides the ideal solution.

So, it’s good that you’re thinking, and we all know that no one knows everything. Still, if this is a common phrase in your communication with your boss, then you have a big communication problem, whether that be your boss isn’t being clear and/or you are not interpreting directives appropriately. In either case, clarity should be your new priority. Determine the best way to avoid future miscommunications, not excuses for the results. 

In most cases, your reward is simply retaining your job. Of course, you should be compensated for your work, and there will always be that boss that thinks he can just add free errand runner into your job description. There’s a fine line between being a team player and being unfairly taken advantage of in working off the clock or around the clock. Fair labor laws outline acceptable workplace practices; use it and your common sense as a guide for what’s appropriate or not. 

Are you guilty of any of these professional relationship destroyers? Can you think of anything you’ve said to your boss and now regret? Tell us your thoughts and stories in the comment section.